IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Recently, the people in many countries can live and work anywhere they choose with improved communication technology and transport. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages

#people #countries #work #communication #technology #transport
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Undeniably, more and more
people
Use synonyms
 make their efforts to find different places to live or work all around the world, which
is
Verb problem
has
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 more benefits than corresponding drawbacks. It is obvious that choosing a comfortable place where communities can live or have a career contributes to
a
Remove the article
apply
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high efficiency and quality of
life
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. To be more specific, different
people
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 have a wide
ranges
Correct the article-noun agreement
range
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 of viewpoints
to
Change preposition
on
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 any part of the world and the lifestyles which make them suitable
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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also
Linking Words
 various. Some
people
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 prefer living a quiet and peaceful
life
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, but others
is
Verb problem
do
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opposite
Correct article usage
the opposite
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. In fact,
people
Use synonyms
 can choose a modern city or a town which has
a
Correct article usage
apply
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good weather
condition
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
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, service or education with the development of transport which makes them to be accessible to any area in the world. At the same time that they choose a livable city, they can work online via
the
Correct article usage
apply
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online communication technology.
By
Change preposition
In
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this
Linking Words
 way, they reduce commuting time and improve balance between work and
life
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 in order to advance the flexibility and effectiveness of jobs. Admittedly, some considerations have indicated that a few
of
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apply
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disadvantages
also
Linking Words
 have been brought at the same time. In fact, it leads to an over-reliance on conversation technology and traffic fluency which can bring residents’ lives to a standstill once they go wrong.
However
Linking Words
, all of these worries illustrated above are unreasonable and unnecessary for
people
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.
In other words
Linking Words
, with the improvement of technology, the government attach importance to maintenance. They
also
Linking Words
 prepare contingency plans to deal with emergencies.
For example
Linking Words
, the
official
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officials
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 set up maintenance stations in each city and train many professional maintenance workers to ensure the normal
life
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 of
people
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 every year. In essence, based on the arguments, there are more merits than flaws in living or working anywhere
people
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 want. In fact, the government will protect
people
Use synonyms
's normal
life
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.
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task response
Strengthen your task response by addressing potential disadvantages in more detail, and provide more nuanced analysis. You could discuss specific consequences of over-reliance on communication and transport technology.
coherence and cohesion
Focus on clearer organization by using linking words more effectively to enhance coherence. This will help to better connect ideas and transitions within and between paragraphs.
task response
Provide more specific examples to support your ideas. Real-life examples or news events related to the topic can help demonstrate the points discussed.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which help frame the argument and give your writing structure.
task response
You have logically presented main points and attempted to explain both advantages and potential disadvantages of the topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Remote work
  • Geographical constraints
  • Global understanding
  • Socio-economic disparities
  • Carbon footprint
  • Work-life balance
  • Brain drain
  • Economic disparity
  • Cultural enrichment
  • Environmental costs
What to do next:
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