The internet has transformed the way information is shared and consumed, but it has also created problems that did not exist before. What are the most serious problems associated with the internet and what solutions can you suggest?

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Nowadays, how people get and spread
message
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messages
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has changed in
this
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new era of the
internet
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.
This
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shift could create new problems that would not been predicted before. In
this
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essay, I will examine the most serious problem called cybercrime and what can we do, especially as a young community to minimize the negative impact of the
internet
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. There is a backside effect of the
internet
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called cybercrime.
This
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phenomenon emerged from
huge
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a huge
the huge
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wave of info
in
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on
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the
internet
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that might
also
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caused by
misunderstanding
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misunderstandings
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from
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among
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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users. For the “new people” getting through modern society
especially
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, especially
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the Gen-X and
baby-boomer
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baby boomers
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who
was
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were
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born before
’80s
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the ’80s
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, over-sharing of personal
data
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and info could potentially start
this
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criminal activity.
For example
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, when a person shares his/her family details and puts the personal mobile number, it can be misused by the criminal actor to make false
information
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to get the benefit. He/she will pretend to help your family that accidentally got injured or hospitalized
then
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request some money as feedback
while
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it just a hoax.
Moreover
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, in the more extreme conditions, he/she is likely
detest
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to detest
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your son/daughter by tracking his/her history locations and pursuing some money to release him/her.
Then
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, we must pay attention to the personal
data
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on the
internet
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. As the most
internet
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-exposed generation, we are the young people has to maintain and campaign about dealing the personal
data
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on the
internet
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. We can start from our personal social media by just taking not-so-personal
information
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, maybe just where the city we live not fully mentioning the exact address of the home.
Also
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, we could use our social media and virtual community to share and campaign about
this
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vulnerable issue of personal
data
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and
information
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to ensure that more elderly people are aware of it. In conclusion, even though more benefits we can get from the
internet
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, we must keep our personal
data
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and
information
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in the modern public society for
our
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apply
show examples
safety reasons.
Submitted by kurniawanps7 on

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task response
Make sure to clearly address all parts of the essay question in your response to fully achieve the task. Consider discussing more than one problem related to the internet to provide a comprehensive response.
task response
Some points could be further elaborated or supported with additional examples to enhance clarity and provide depth to the ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Consider crafting smoother transitions between paragraphs and ideas to strengthen cohesion.
task response
You have clearly identified a major issue related to the internet, which is cybercrime, and provided a potential solution focusing on young people's role, which is a strong point of the essay.
coherence and cohesion
The essay is structured with a clear introduction and conclusion, helping the reader to follow the argument.
coherence and cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and reiterates the importance of the discussed solution.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • cybersecurity
  • phishing
  • identity theft
  • misinformation
  • fake news
  • social isolation
  • internet addiction
  • data privacy
  • digital literacy
  • regulations
  • awareness programs
  • manipulate
  • proliferation
  • consent
  • escalated
What to do next:
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