IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

In some countries it is illegal to stop people applying for a job because of their age. Is this a positive or a negative development?

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Introduction
in
feou
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four
 year back to the
canadin
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Canadian
 record to grate
work
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
yeang
Correct your spelling
yang
peopal
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people
 to old
peopal
Correct your spelling
people
Use synonyms
yeang
Correct your spelling
yang
 are good
avelte
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value
svelte
 to
bild
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build
 up the
sistum
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system
sistrum
 to the old gay
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 will
discrive
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describe
 to my
opanin
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opinion
opening
bello
Change the capitalization
Bello
show examples
.
Body paragraph 1
as par cen the
yeangs
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years
peopal
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people
 so fast he have good
awlity
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ability
 to
fixde
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fix
fixed
 the
secuation
Correct your spelling
situation
section
also
Linking Words
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
 have lots of stamina to bust is
unenitys
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unity
 so
thats
Correct your spelling
that
 will so
stron
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strong
 to jas
becos
Correct your spelling
becomes
Use synonyms
yeang
Correct your spelling
yang
young
 gase
avelate
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evaluate
 are so
storong
Correct your spelling
strong
 ,
Body paragraph 2
he
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
grate
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great
show examples
 full plane to
work
Use synonyms
 side or fast
work
Use synonyms
morover
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moreover
 is
minde
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mine
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 sharp
alos
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also
 gaye are ball and
good
Add an article
a good
show examples
 time
to
Replace the word
too
show examples
he
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
work
Use synonyms
 and
manten
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mantel
 to the
contre
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country
 or city
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 well
dscrive
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describe
drive
 my
opaninan
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opening
 to old
peopal
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people
 in billo.
Body paragraph 3
othe
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On the
 hand the old
peopal
Correct your spelling
people
 are thinking are
stron
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strong
 to the
Use synonyms
yeang peopal
Correct your spelling
young people
wat
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want
show examples
 the old gays not to active
becos
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because
his
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 Aag limit wan
cros
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cross
 to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
45,
than
Replace the word
then
show examples
work
Use synonyms
wase
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was
show examples
 slow
becos
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because
this
Linking Words
 gay are not that
sarp
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sharp
 nas or
smaret
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smart
 nus not active
morover
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moreover
Use synonyms
yeang
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being
gay
Change preposition
On gay
show examples
 was
sotp
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stop
 to the Aag
limt
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limit
list
tpo
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to
cros
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cross
 50
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
dscrive
Correct your spelling
describe
drive
 my
opanin
Correct your spelling
opinion
opening
.
Conclusion
acoding
Correct your spelling
According
 to the
Use synonyms
yeang
Correct your spelling
yang
 gase are smart to the old gay jas wecos my sajst the old
peopal
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people
work
Use synonyms
 for the
comany
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company
 or
govermant
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government
sakter
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skater
saker
 wan
thes
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this
 gase cross the Aag than
tha
Correct your spelling
the
that
probide
Correct your spelling
provide
 pansin plane if
tha
Correct your spelling
they
 need to
peopal
Correct your spelling
people
tha
Correct your spelling
that
 will give you good
sagtion
Correct your spelling
sanction
section
 how to
work
Use synonyms
 good le be old gay are the have
exprins
Correct your spelling
express
 to the
Use synonyms
yeang
Correct your spelling
yang
 pipal!

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coherence cohesion
Consider organizing your essay into clear paragraphs: introduction, body, and conclusion. This will help readers follow your argument more easily.
task achievement
Try to include more specific examples to support your main points. This will help you achieve a higher level of task achievement.
coherence cohesion
Focus on using more accurate language and structure, as many phrases and sentences are difficult to understand.
task achievement
Strengthen your response by directly addressing whether you believe the law against age discrimination in job applications is positive or negative, and why.
task achievement
The essay attempts to address the question regarding age discrimination in job applications.
task achievement
The writer expresses opinions about both young and old workers, touching on their qualities and capabilities.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • age
  • job
  • work
  • hire
  • fair
  • unfair
  • equal
  • chance
  • people
  • law
  • rule
  • old
  • young
  • skill
  • experience
  • company
  • boss
  • help
  • harm
  • grow
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