In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their level of health is decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken?

#countries #weight #people #level #health #measures

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These days, the big matter that most countries around the world have is that the average weight of their inhabitants is climbing

while

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the level of their health is reducing.

This

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essay discusses the main reasons for

this

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problem and how we can solve

this

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situation. In the new era, the factors that have a lot of effect on obesity are the methods of

lifestyle

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and eating habits. On the one hand, today, people have a sedentary

lifestyle

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owing to the fact that technology is developing and they have access to a range of devices that improve their

lifestyle

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quality.

For example

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, populations do not need to spend a great deal of

time

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doing housework because robots do their work.

On the other hand

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, most of the global inhabitants spend a lot of their

time

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working and they do not have sufficient

time

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for cooking.

Therefore

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, they prefer to eat convenient food

that is

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really cheap and has a number of negative items ,

such

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as oil, sugar and so on.

This

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obstacle can be solved by governments. authorities have to advertise the activity and encourage people to do their work without using new devices or investing some

time

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in doing sports like running in the park.

In addition

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, when governments get a lot of taxes from the public who buy fast food or goods that are calorie-dense,

then

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the individuals are persuaded to eat low-calorie meals namely, vegetables.

To conclude

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, the overweight which is a consequence of developing a sedentary

lifestyle

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and faulty eating habits has to be altered by governments. In fact, authorities have access to some elements that have an influence on their unconscious and put them under pressure to change their food ingredients.

Submitted by maryamkazemi968 on Sun Jan 05 2025

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task achievement

Try to integrate more specific examples to illustrate your points more vividly, as concrete examples can enhance understanding.

coherence cohesion

Work on varying sentence structures and using more transition words to improve the flow and connection between paragraphs.

coherence cohesion

The introduction sets a clear agenda for the essay, providing a concise overview of the issue.

coherence cohesion

The essay maintains a logical structure throughout, with a clear division of causes and solutions.

coherence cohesion

The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and offers a concise resolution to the problem addressed.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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10
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

286 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

average weight
level of health
processed foods
calorie-dense
unhealthy fats
sedentary lifestyle
balanced diet
urbanization
fast food options
nutritional education
emotional eating
economic factors
convenience
streaming services
smart devices
transportation
mental health
stressful lifestyles
physical activity

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In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their level of health is decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken?

Your opinion

Some people think that the best way to resolve environmental problems is to increase fuel and vehicles’ prices. Do you agree or disagree with the statement?

Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Some people feel that entertainers such as film stars, pop musicians, or sports stars are paid too much money. Do you agree or disagree? Which other type of job should be highly paid?

Some people believe that children who commit crimes should be punished. Others think the parents should be punished instead. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.