IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

It is a good idea to have large public spaces in towns and cities such as parks and squares. Do you agree or disagree? Why?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There is no denying the fact that the main purpose of having large public areas in cities or towns is debatable.
While
Linking Words
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 there is a commonly held belief that these places are considered important to both the
people
Use synonyms
 and the
environment
Use synonyms
, there is
also
Linking Words
 an argument that opposite it. In my opinion, I think parks and squares add more to the design of the city as they provide the perfect place for walking, doing an
excercise
Correct your spelling
exercise
 or feeding the birds and other benefits that I will discuss below. To start with, the cities need an open area away from the
conjusted
Correct your spelling
congested
conjured
 streets and the loudness of cars as
people
Use synonyms
 get the chance to inhale fresh air and walk their dogs.
However
Linking Words
, these spots encourage
people
Use synonyms
 to do some physical activities,
visualing
Correct your spelling
visualising
 nature as trees and flowers surround them.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the
environment
Use synonyms
 will
improves
Change the verb form
improve
show examples
 when green areas are increased.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, nowadays in certain countries including
iraq
Change the capitalization
Iraq
show examples
, there is a lot of neglect regarding
this
Linking Words
 subject, as many buildings are constructed side by side without leaving any space for constructing public spaces.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, various trees across the town were removed for the newly constructed roads, leaving the
environment
Use synonyms
 struggling with a low number of trees and green spaces. In
conclousion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
, despite
people
Use synonyms
 having various views regarding
this
Linking Words
 topic, I believe that
people
Use synonyms
 in each town or city need
such
Linking Words
 locations because it is still a demand for the sake of the
people
Use synonyms
themselives
Correct your spelling
themselves
 and for the sake of the
environment
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Ensure to provide more specific examples that bolster your main arguments. This can enrich your essay and make your points more persuasive.
general advice
Pay attention to minor grammatical and spelling errors, such as 'conjusted' and 'in conclousion'. Though they don't significantly impact understanding, polishing them can improve clarity.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion that outlines and summarizes your viewpoints effectively.
task achievement
You clearly present the advantages of public spaces in urban areas, like promoting exercise and improving air quality.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • urban planning
  • community engagement
  • mental well-being
  • physical activity
  • social interactions
  • aesthetic appeal
  • biodiversity
  • urban congestion
  • air quality
  • communal activities
  • environmental benefits
  • green spaces
  • urban heat islands
  • sense of belonging
  • tourism appeal
What to do next:
Look at other essays: