Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child’s development while others think that it is important for children to go to school. Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your own opinion. Giver reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience

#people #children #home #child’s #development #school #methods #giver

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There is no denying the fact that there are various methods of teaching

children

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While

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it is a commonly held belief that teaching

children

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home

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is considered a beneficial option for their own development, there is

also

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an argument that it would be more gainful for them if they attended their classes at

school

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. In my opinion, I consider that

school

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education is crucial for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

children

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’s growth and development.

To begin

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with,

home

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teaching holds several benefits for the student. It is

also

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possible to say that, teaching at

home

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will make the

child

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save more time compared to the

school

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teaching method, which will let the

child

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have sufficient time to practise other hobbies

such

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as swimming or playing football.

In addition

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, at

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home

Add a comma

home,

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the

child

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will be the only student for the teacher, which will facilitate the transformation process of the information.

For example

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, if the

child

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took privet lessons, it will help the tutor to focus on enhancing the weak points of that

child

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. Another point to consider, schools' benefits are not exclusive

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show examples

teaching science subjects, but

Correct pronoun usage

they

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also

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build the

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children

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children's

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characters

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character

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and improve their social skills.

In other words

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school's

Correct article usage

the school's

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environment will ensure those

children

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will bond together.

Moreover

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, there are various types of studies

have

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that have

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proven that

school

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education is crucial and it should be mandatory for all

children

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in order to grow in a healthy environment that will assist them in building diverse relationships with their companions.

For instance

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, leaders and creative people who have accomplished significant changes in the world studied at schools and that influenced their actions at the current time. In conclusion, despite people having different points of view, I tend to believe that it depends on every

child

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's circumstances and abilities,

however

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school

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is a substantial factor

for

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show examples

kids’ growth process.

Submitted by omima7a7md on Mon Jan 06 2025

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Coherence & Cohesion

Improve the logical flow between arguments to make the transitions smoother and clearer.

Task Achievement

Provide more balanced discussion by elaborating on the advantages of each method with specific examples.

General Writing

Proofread for minor grammatical errors such as subject-verb agreement or punctuation that slightly hinder clarity.

Coherence & Cohesion

There is a strong introduction and conclusion that frame the discussion effectively.

Task Achievement

The essay provides a balanced discussion with arguments for both home teaching and school education.

Task Achievement

The writer uses relevant examples, such as private lessons and leadership examples, to support main points.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

305 words

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