Some people believe that hard work and determination are the main requirements to become successful in life, while others say there are other factors lead to success. Discuss both vies and give your opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Working hard and being determined have always been the main steps of success,

however

Linking Words

, some believe that other factors

also

Linking Words

contribute to being successful. Both these views will be discussed in the following essay.

To begin

Linking Words

with, nothing in

life

Use synonyms

come

Correct subject-verb agreement

comes

show examples

easily or freely,

therefore

Linking Words

, one needs to be hardworking and determined in order that he/she can achieve his

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

hers

Correct pronoun usage

her

show examples

goals in

life

Use synonyms

Secondly

Linking Words

, if someone has certain targets to be successful they should start putting

great

Change the article

a great

show examples

deal of effort, and

also

Linking Words

must be quite focused on the targets.

For instance

Linking Words

, when an engineer

set

Wrong verb form

sets

show examples

up a company, he or she essentially has to be working industriously and rather decisive about the business goals,

otherwise

Linking Words

the success will not be accomplished.

On the other hand

Linking Words

however

Linking Words

, there are other factors

also

Linking Words

great

Change preposition

of great

show examples

importance

Change preposition

for

show examples

accomplishment,

such

Linking Words

as capital, education and business plan.

For example

Linking Words

, money is

the

Change the article

apply

show examples

one of the main tools of performance, sometimes a person might be

fundamentaly

Correct your spelling

fundamentally

decided and relatively diligent, but unfortunately, if he or she does not have the required resources the desired outcome may not be achieved. Another reason for achieving objectives in

life

Use synonyms

is a good education. To illustrate, if an individual is not educated about business and

other aspect

Change the wording

another aspect

other aspects

show examples

of it, his or

hers

Correct the word

her

show examples

decisiveness and energy may not lead to a desired goal.

To sum up

Linking Words

, when everything above mentioned is taken under consideration, even though determination and working laboriously are vital aspects of becoming successful in

life

Use synonyms

, there are other determiners,

such

Linking Words

as capital and resources, and

therefore

Linking Words

, in my

opinion

Add a comma

opinion,

show examples

not just determination and working-hard contribute to the success but

also

Linking Words

others as well.

duygulaleogluMon Jan 06 2025

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Ensure that examples provided are directly relevant and specific enough to substantiate the points made. Providing concrete and clear examples will strengthen the task response.

coherence and cohesion

Although the essay is well-structured, working on the flow between ideas will enhance coherence. It is advisable to use a wider range of linking words to guide the reader smoothly from one point to the next.

coherence and cohesion

The essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, both of which effectively summarize the main points and provide a coherent frame for the essay.

task achievement

The essay responds fully to the task by discussing both viewpoints and providing the writer's own opinion, which is articulated in the conclusion.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

276 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

8
band
some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. discuss both these views and give yourown opinion.
It is thought by some people that several professional jobs such as doctors or engineers should work and stay in their motherland while others believe they have the freedom to decide which countries they want to work in. In this essay, both viewpoints will be outlined before reaching my conclusion.
7
band
Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Nowadays, there are many courses offered to college students. Also, the students can choose subjects that they want to study. Some people believe that focusing on major subjects is more crucial than studying both mandatory and elective subjects because main subjects will give more opportunities in the student’s career in the future. Meanwhile, some people consider that the additional subjects can be beneficial for students as well. This essay will elaborate on both views and provide my opinion.
7
band
Some people think that governments should spend money for faster public transportation, others think that there are other important priorities (e.g. cost, environment). Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Some individuals argue that authorities ought to spend money on faster public transportation, while others believe that there are other crucial precedences, such as cost and environment. I believe we should spend money on transportation but also spend payment on other things, I will elaborate on it in this essay.
7.5
band
Today, the high sales of popular consumer goods re- flect the power of advertising and not the real needs of the society in which they are sold. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
At the moment, society's needs are not reflected through sold things; it is the power of advertising that plays a significant role in the high selling rate of consumer goods. I do not agree with the statement because people buy items preferably through the list of primary and secondary needs and advertisement only supports as a communication bridge from the producers to the consumers.
<4
band
Some university students want to learn about other subject, in addition to main others, believe it is a more important to give all their time and attention to studying for qualification
There is no doubt that science is a very important to people life. The aim of science making life is easy. I agree, because the almost science beginning from problem it's happened with a people. Therefore, science not stop linking with people. It's a temres of a positive side. The science answered many questions and solving with the problem. For example, communication with people she was a problem. In the beginning they were used the paper message. That need a long time before delivered. The science found solution. The phone. As a result people calling effortloss. Further more people walking to go work and school. Also use the horse. To far place. And going to other city. This is useful although he want a long time days and week to reach the place. What you want. Was the question how I going to other city without offered and a less time. The answer the car. Their mothed is a very effective in time and afford solving. This proves clearly that the one aim for science improving quality...

Some people believe that hard work and determination are the main requirements to become successful in life, while others say there are other factors lead to success. Discuss both vies and give your opinion.

Your opinion

some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. discuss both these views and give yourown opinion.

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that governments should spend money for faster public transportation, others think that there are other important priorities (e.g. cost, environment). Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Today, the high sales of popular consumer goods re- flect the power of advertising and not the real needs of the society in which they are sold. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some university students want to learn about other subject, in addition to main others, believe it is a more important to give all their time and attention to studying for qualification