Some people believe that cell phones should be for personal use only. others however feel cell phone should be used mostly for work. discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Using portable
phones
Use synonyms
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
kept some people believe it is better for them to utilize it for personal use,
while
Linking Words
others think that people should use it mostly for
work
Use synonyms
.
However
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in my opinion the innovation of smartphones facilitated everything to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
humans whether the usage should be
personally
Change the word
personal
show examples
or for
work
Use synonyms
, and in
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
essay,
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I will show both views with my opinion.
Cell
Use synonyms
phones
Use synonyms
nowadays are everywhere across the world, and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
phones
Use synonyms
become
necessity
Add an article
a necessity
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to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
individuals ,
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however
Add a comma
however,
show examples
some believe that
phones
Use synonyms
should be only used personally. And those who tend to
this
Linking Words
idea,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
think that the main
useage
Correct your spelling
usage
is for connecting to their friends or taking pictures for memorable moments and
also
Linking Words
watching funny videos from social media platforms.
Which
Correct pronoun usage
This
show examples
let
Verb problem
makes
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me believe that their main usage of smartphones is for
entartainment
Correct your spelling
entertainment
only. But
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
the other hand, some
pepole
Correct your spelling
people
believe that smartphones should be merely for
work
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, which is like sending
mailes
Correct your spelling
mail
or making communication with the company to do their daily huddles. And those
think
Correct pronoun usage
who think
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that the purpose of
cell
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phones
Use synonyms
is
necessary
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
to get their
work
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done not
wasting
Wrong verb form
waste
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their time
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
something that won't do
any thing
Correct your spelling
anything
show examples
for their lives.
Linking Words
Whereas in
Correct word choice
In
show examples
my opinion, I think that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cell
Use synonyms
phones
Use synonyms
have brought everything
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
humans
Fix the agreement mistake
human
show examples
lives, and we can not
Add a missing verb
be restirected
show examples
restirected
Correct your spelling
restricted
for
work
Use synonyms
or
entartainment
Correct your spelling
entertainment
, and I believe humans need it for both. In
Correct your spelling
addition
addation
Add a comma
addation,
show examples
the
cell
Use synonyms
phone has
ease
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eased
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
work
Use synonyms
and
give
Wrong verb form
given
show examples
us the chance to spend our leisure time with it. Eventually, it is difficult to choose whether the usage
was
Wrong verb form
is
show examples
for personal use or for
work
Use synonyms
, and the
cell
Use synonyms
phone has
bcame
Correct your spelling
become
became
necessary personally and for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
work
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by mohnnad.als on

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task achievement
Expand on the arguments by providing more specific examples to make your points more convincing.
task achievement
Try to refine the development of ideas to increase clarity and depth of insight.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each point is clearly linked to the next to enhance flow and readability.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction which outlines the topic and your stance on it.
task achievement
Both viewpoints are discussed, providing a balanced view of the topic.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion summarizes the main points effectively and restates your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • work-life balance
  • productivity
  • remote working
  • communication
  • access to information
  • privacy
  • leisure
  • social connections
  • personal development
  • educational apps
  • guidelines
  • regulating
  • managing cell phone usage
  • blurring the lines
  • employers' role
What to do next:
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