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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The charts below show the growth in the population in some of the world’s largest cities over three time periods. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the growth in the population in some of the world’s largest cities over three time periods. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#show #growth #population #world’s #cities #three #time #periods #information #features #comparisons
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The bar charts illustrate the growth in the population in some of the world's largest cities ( Tokyo, New
York
Use synonyms
, Shanghai,
Bombay
Use synonyms
 and
Jakarta
Use synonyms
 ) over three time periods ( 1970, 1990 and 2010 ). As a general overview, after analyzing the graph, it can be seen that Tokyo was highest populated city among others in each year.
On the contrary
Linking Words
,
Jakarta
Use synonyms
 was
least
Correct article usage
the least
show examples
 in both years except 2010 when New
York
Use synonyms
 reached to least.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, in 1970, Tokyo had more than 15 million citizens and surpassed the rest
while
Linking Words
 the least ,
Jakarta
Use synonyms
, was almost zero approximately 2
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
.
Futhermore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
, New
Use synonyms
york
Capitalize word
York
show examples
 and Shanghai were close to each other with almost 14 and 12
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 respectively.
Lastly
Linking Words
,
Bombay
Use synonyms
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 just 5 million in 1970. Moving on to 1990, the orders were
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 among the popular cities
Linking Words
however
Add the comma(s)
, however
show examples
, in
this
Linking Words
 year
Bombay
Use synonyms
 and
Jakarta
Use synonyms
 saw
significant
Correct article usage
a significant
show examples
 increase more than doubled
than
Change preposition
from
show examples
 their previous year to 12 and 8
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 inhabitants .
Although
Linking Words
, New
Use synonyms
york
Capitalize word
York
show examples
 and Shanghai
also
Linking Words
 climbed
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
with almost 3
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 total.
Tokya
Correct your spelling
Tokyo
 had still the first one and peaked rapidly with almost 10 million people.
Finally
Linking Words
 in 2010, again all five cities showed an upward trend especially
Bombay
Use synonyms
 had
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
, doubled its population in two decades.
Submitted by zeynepsuakinal on

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 85%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words york, bombay, jakarta, millions with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 4 times.
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