The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.

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The line graph compares the number of the population living in cities ,for over 70 years increase how many people will live. It is obvious that the percentage of the population increased in each city during the period shown.

Overall

Linking Words

most success was Malaysia and Indonesia. Despite Malaysia in first place Indonesia, relying on statistics, rapidly grew thereby overtaking the figure proportion of citizens Thailand and the Philippines had taken second place in the line. The rate of residents in Thailand has notably slowed since 1990 and ended 30 years ago exactly in 2020 after

they

Correct your spelling

the

show examples

gradually

Change the word

gradual

show examples

residents growth,in the Philippines percentage of the residents was normal before 1990.

However

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,they surprisingly start to grow in the wrong direction decade by decade.

Nevertheless

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, that didn’t stop them from growing. Malaysia started growing enormously in 1990

moreover

Linking Words

they still growing,

therefore

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, they reached a peak in the end,

in addition

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, Indonesia can be proud of

their

Correct pronoun usage

its

show examples

population, and they

also

Linking Words

reached a peak in the end.

Although

Linking Words

Thailand

Change preposition

show examples

the

last

Linking Words

place they

sightly

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

rose confidently,the Philippines began to increase gradually.

However

Linking Words

,the rate started to fall slightly after 3 decades exactly in 2010 they got normal and started to grow as usual.

Submitted by ansa13 on Wed Jan 08 2025

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".

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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

195 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

graph
percentage
population
Asian countries
living in cities
1970
2020
predictions
2030
2040
introduction
overview
trend
body paragraph
compare
predicted percentages
summarize
closing statement

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The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.

In modern society, ambition is more and more important. How important is ambition for being successful in life? Is it positive or negative? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Radio will no longer be able to hold its presence, as television and internet media will replace it very soon. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that environmental problems should be solved on a global scale, while others believe it is better to deal with them nationally. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.