some people think that governments should invest more money in public trasnportation systems to reduce

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
As society continues to progress the issue of
traffic
Use synonyms
has emerged as an issue, that must be addressed. To solve
this
Linking Words
problem,
while
Linking Words
some individuals contend that there are alternative strategies to reduce
traffic
Use synonyms
frequency,
however
Linking Words
, I firmly believe that governments should allocate more funds to public
transportation
Use synonyms
.
As
Correct word choice
This
show examples
this
Linking Words
will
provide to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
reduce private
vehicles
Use synonyms
, especially in urban areas and help to
increase
Use synonyms
the
quality
Use synonyms
of the
air
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
essay will examine the key arguments supporting my viewpoint and provide relevant ideas to
justif
Correct your spelling
justify
it. The primary reason for inversing to public
transportation
Use synonyms
is it can reduce the number of private
vehicles
Use synonyms
in
traffic
Use synonyms
and it is a valid reason for addressing
this
Linking Words
issue. To better illustrate, when governments
increase
Use synonyms
the number of and the range of public
transportation
Use synonyms
many people who use private
vehicles
Use synonyms
would prefer these services rather than staying in
traffic
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, it will be
also
Linking Words
beneficial for our environment in order
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
their energy usage when compared to private
vehicles
Use synonyms
.
Hence
Linking Words
, these considerations explain why the government must allocate funds to public
transportation
Use synonyms
. An additional reason for my stance is that
this
Linking Words
can assist
to
Change preposition
in increasing
show examples
increase
Use synonyms
the
quality
Use synonyms
of the
air
Use synonyms
. Granted, some people claim that there cannot be a significant
increase
Use synonyms
in
air
Use synonyms
quality
Use synonyms
because both
vehicles
Use synonyms
release harmful gases into the environment. It is a narrow-minded approach.
While
Linking Words
the argument is not completely false,
however
Linking Words
, it must be considered that public transportations have more capacity and can be able to used by many people
while
Linking Words
consuming the same amount of energy as private
vehicles
Use synonyms
.
Accordingly
Linking Words
, investing in public
transportation
Use synonyms
can be an effective way to sustain the
air
Use synonyms
quality
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, I would argue that governments should allocate more funds to public
transportation
Use synonyms
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because it will be an effective way to reduce the number of private
vehicles
Use synonyms
and it will sustain better
air
Use synonyms
quality
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by yusufpacaci1863 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Try to provide clearer examples for each main point. For instance, mention a specific city or country where increased funding for public transportation has led to reduced traffic or improved air quality.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to use transitional words more effectively to maintain a smooth flow of ideas. This will help to connect sentences and paragraphs more coherently.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion which effectively frame the argument.
coherence cohesion
The main points are well-linked to the central argument, strengthening the essay’s overall cohesion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: