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Writing Samples
Band 8

Some people say that universities should only accept the young people with high marks. However, others think that universities should accept people of all ages that may not do well in school. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. [EDUCATION]

#people #universities #marks #ages #school #[education]
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It is widely believed that only young students with high academic performances should be enrolled in universities,
while
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 others suggest that educational members should select people of all ages. In my perspective, I partly align with both points of view
due to
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 the following reasons. On one hand, it is reasonable to opt for outstanding young pupils, as they come up to the university’s standards. These sorts of people are capable of conducting theoretical instructions, potentially having brilliant minds and problem-solving skills needed for more complicated subjects, which meet the demand of schools- the seek for higher education. Compared to those who are below par, it seems difficult to make allowances for them to get entries, on the grounds of bad-quality learning competence.
For example
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, most prominent colleges in ASEAN prefer to choose students owing great educational levels.
However
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, I am convinced that people should broaden the range of admission, not only the young but
also
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 the older, more or less. School is a place for attaining academic goals, so if anyone excels in the entrance exam, it is advisable to give him a chance to become the official. Regardless of age, wielding educational achievement is enough for consideration. To exemplify, some despite being in their autumn years, still become learners in universities, which is attributed to the fact that they are well-qualified.
Besides
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, getting high marks in the past does not ensure the possibility of continuing success.
Accordingly
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, entrance selection will be a determinant to sort out the suitable, beyond a particular kind. All things considered, it is best to accept different types, given that they fit into the study environment.
Submitted by caivankihh779 on

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task achievement
Ensure that main points support your thesis effectively, and examples are relevant and specific to your argument.
coherence cohesion
Work on refining your linkage between paragraphs to enhance the overall flow and make it more seamless.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task achievement
Both sides of the argument are discussed, showing a balanced approach.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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