IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Nowadays, governments are investing more in public transport such as buses and trains rather than in building new roads. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or negative development?

#governments #transport #buses #trains #roads #development
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In recent years, Central governments are investing more in Public Transport
such
Linking Words
 as buses and trains rather than constructing new roads. Overpopulation and global warming are the two major reasons for
this
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shifting
Replace the word
shift
show examples
 and it will
also
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 produce positive development of the country. In
this
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 essay, I will discuss the positive impacts/advantages of
this
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 development.
Usage
Correct article usage
The usage
show examples
 of Private vehicles
emit
Correct subject-verb agreement
emits
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lot
Add an article
a lot
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 of
carbondioxide
Correct your spelling
carbon dioxide
 and
lead
Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
show examples
 to global warming.
Introduction
Correct article usage
The introduction
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 of Public
transportation
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as buses,
share
Replace the word
shared
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 autos and metro trains can significantly reduce
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
pollution
as well as
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 traffic congestion.
Moreover
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, Public
transports
Fix the agreement mistake
transport
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 are affordable and convenient way of commuting.
Apart from
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this
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, mass
transportation
Use synonyms
 is eco-friendly and improves social
connection
Fix the agreement mistake
connections
show examples
.
Example
Change preposition
For example
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: Russia and China are working on Electric vehicles which can accommodate 50 to 60 members and can travel 100
kms
Correct your spelling
km
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 a single charge. Even though
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 the implementation of
this
Linking Words
 Public
transportation
Use synonyms
 is adverse for the local government
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
with numerous benefits, it can be easily succeeded. Encouraging the use of mass commuting can reduce the use of fossil fuels and preserve the environment. Most of the developed countries like Japan and USA are already using Jet trains and underground buses for their
day to day
Add a hyphen
day-to-day
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 transport.
On
Change preposition
In
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concluding
Replace the word
conclusion
show examples
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
, regular use of Public transport can not only benefit the government but
also
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to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the citizens of the country. Population rise and climate change can be reduced by implementing and investing in Public
transportation
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 positive impact may improve the standard of living
as well as
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GDP
Correct article usage
the GDP
show examples
 of the country's economy.
Submitted by ksanthosh701 on

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task achievement
Try to provide specific examples that are directly relevant to the topic to strengthen your arguments.
task achievement
Ensure that your points are fully developed and explained, particularly in supporting your main arguments with examples.
coherence cohesion
Work on enhancing the flow between sentences and paragraphs by using a variety of linking words and devices.
coherence cohesion
The essay effectively introduces the topic and concludes with a strong summary of the main points.
task achievement
Good use of specific examples, such as referencing electric vehicles in Russia and China, which supports your argument well.
task achievement
The essay addresses both parts of the prompt, discussing reasons for government investment in public transport and identifying it as a positive development.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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