IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In a number of countries, some people think it is neccessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Disscus both these views and give your own opinion.

#countries #people #neccessary #sums #money #railway #lines #trains #cities #transport #disscus
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Nowadays, in many
countries
Add a comma
countries,
show examples
 public
transport
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 is pretty important for
people
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.
People
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 tend to use them almost every day for different aims like going to work and school and so on. Some of these regular users claim that
Correct article usage
a numbers
show examples
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
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 of
new-fast
Correct your spelling
new fast
show examples
trains
Use synonyms
 are required,
whereas
Linking Words
 others say the renovation of the old one is more needed. In
this
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 essay,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 will discuss both views and give my opinion with an example. It is argued that tax
peyers'
Correct your spelling
payers
payer's
money
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 should be spent on building
new-high-speed
Correct your spelling
new high-speed
show examples
 railways. They believe it is a good way to
shorter
Replace the word
shorten
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they
Correct your spelling
the
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time
Use synonyms
 they commute every day. Take
the
Correct article usage
apply
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china's metros as an example,
in
Correct word choice
apply
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there
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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it only takes
only
Rephrase
apply
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half an hour to go from one city to very far destinations. It means for many
people
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distances
Fix the agreement mistake
distance
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 is not an obstacle anymore to
find
Wrong verb form
finding
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 work.
In addition
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, many
people
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 tend to use
trains
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 rather than their own
car
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cars
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.
Which
Correct pronoun usage
This
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 means
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
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 cars
in
Change preposition
on
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 the roads and results in
controling
Correct your spelling
controlling
 traffic jams
as well as
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 pollution.
On the other hand
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, some
people
Use synonyms
 strongly believe that the
exicting
Correct your spelling
existing
exciting
transport
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 facilities should be repaired. They argue that for building fast
trains
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, new stations and
infrustructures
Correct your spelling
infrastructures
infrastructure
 are needed which means lots of
time
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 and
money
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.
Instead
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 of that we should allocate our budget to repair the transports that we already have in order to make them more
convinient
Correct your spelling
convenient
 and attractive for
people
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 to use.
For example
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, improving the
trains
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 that are
using
Wrong verb form
used
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 with new ones which are more modern inside and
out side
Correct your spelling
outside
show examples
.
To sum up
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,
transport
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 facilities are useful in lots of
people
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's
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
. Upgrading the existing
transport
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 tools tends to need less
time
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 and
money
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whilest
Correct your spelling
whilst
while
 the situation is
posite
Correct your spelling
positive
 in terms of Speed railways.
However
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,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 believe investigating
money
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 and
time
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 on fast
trains
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 is
invasigating
Correct your spelling
investigating
money
Use synonyms
 to some other problems too.
Submitted by bahram.azizzade on

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Grammar Advice
Try to maintain consistent tense usage to strengthen your arguments. Mixing past and present tense can confuse the reader about the timing of your examples.
Task Achievement Advice
While your arguments are clear, further elaboration could provide more depth. Perhaps add more varied examples or expand on the implications of each viewpoint.
Grammar Advice
Working on a few grammatical inaccuracies can enhance clarity, though your overall message is quite comprehensible.
Structure Highlight
Your essay contains a well-structured introduction and conclusion which clearly outlines and summarises the viewpoints.
Balanced Argument Highlight
You have articulated both sides of the argument well, providing a balanced discussion before stating your own opinion.
Use of Examples Highlight
The use of examples, like the China example, grounds your argument in real-world contexts, making it more relatable.
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