Many people believe that the high level of violence in films and TV programmes today is causing serious social problems. What are the problems caused by excessive violence in films and TV? How could these problems be reduced?

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In recent times, the number of
violence
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has surged in the entertainment industry
as well as
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in society. Some groups of people think that nowadays, the high level of brutality in films and TV
programs
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creates serious social problems. I will explain some problems related to it and
also
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mention solutions about how to reduce
this
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phenomenon with relevant examples in the following essay. First and foremost, there are several reasons that can be considered for increasing
violence
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in the cinemas and television industry. Currently, entertainment platforms are using numerous improper language for content, which negatively among all groups of people.
For instance
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, youngsters are watching those types of
programs
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and movies that have inappropriate language and try to adopt it in their daily lives.
Moreover
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, in present times, a lot of
programs
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on the TV are telecasting acts, that contain actions of bullying. A recent study by the University of Waterloo mentioned that 60% of students are creating
violence
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against their classmates.
Moreover
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, by taking some correct steps individuals could be able to reduce these problems. The government should create strong laws regarding those inappropriate shows and movies that are
broadcasting
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broadcast
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. Apart from that, humans have to raise the volume against those people who are creating films and TV
programs
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that have
violence
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in them. At the very least, movies and serials that have crime scenes should be banned from the entertainment industry. In conclusion, it is essential to pay attention to and remove illegal topics from
the
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apply
show examples
films and television
programs
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for the betterment of the community.
Therefore
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, the government should take some proper actions and make proper rules and regulations.
Submitted by ruchin27 on

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task achievement
The essay offers a complete response to the task, discussing both the problems and solutions related to violence in media. However, the examples could be more specific to strengthen the argument. Try to provide concrete scenarios or statistics directly related to film and TV violence.
coherence cohesion
The essay maintains a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, each paragraph could be slightly more focused and supported with cohesive devices to enhance the logic of your argument.
task achievement
The ideas are presented clearly but could benefit from further development. Consider elaborating more on each point with detailed explanations or statistics to support your claims.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively frame the central ideas discussed in the text.
task achievement
The discussion of the influence of improper language in media and its effect on youngsters is insightful and demonstrates an understanding of social issues.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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