IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The chart above shows information about various professions in the U.K. and their salaries. The table shows the average working hours per week for each profession Write a report for a university, lecturer describing the information shown below. Summarise the informahtion by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart above shows information about various professions in the U.K. and their salaries. The table shows the average working hours per week for each profession Write a report for a university, lecturer describing the information shown below. Summarise the informahtion by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
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The given bar chart compares key information about salaries between five employment areas namely police, nurse, teacher, firefighter, and underground driver, in the UK.
In addition
Linking Words
, the table
also
Linking Words
 provides standard working
hours
Use synonyms
 per week among the sectors.  
Overall
Linking Words
, the underground driver gets the highest salary
whereas
Linking Words
 the nurse receives the lowest payment compared to the other types.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the academic staff and firefighters have long
hours
Use synonyms
 doing their job
while
Linking Words
 the underground drivers only have a minimum time for their job.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, the police with average shifts of 40 weekly, acquired income of around € 20,000
although
Linking Words
 they have already done full-time jobs for more than three years.
Then
Linking Words
, a nurse is paid a minimum payment than other professionals, they only obtain money of around €10,000 with 38 full-time jobs.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, teachers and fire officers have a similar duty time of 55
hours
Use synonyms
 but they have different payments.
While
Linking Words
 the fire marshal gets an income of € 40 thousand, the lecturer only obtains € 35,000.
Lastly
Linking Words
, even though the underground driver experienced the short-time pressure duty with only 35
hours
Use synonyms
 each week,
this
Linking Words
 career received the most competitive pay with € 50K.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words hours with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "compares" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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