IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people believe that homework should not be given to children whereas others think that it plays an important role in their education. Discuss both views and also give your opinion.

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Opinions differ regarding whether or not schools and private academies should provide
homework
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 to
children
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. critics insist that it exerts a positive impact on their education. I personally disagree with
this
Linking Words
 assertion since
homework
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help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
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 students to
remind
Verb problem
remember
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 subjects that they have learned at
schools
Fix the agreement mistake
school
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;
therefore
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 they can increase their academic grades. On the one hand, there is a reason why
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
show examples
 should give
homework
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 to young students.
Firstly
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, critics argue that providing
homework
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 to
children
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do
Correct subject-verb agreement
does
show examples
 harm to their mental health because they might feel pressure and fear. To explain, if they receive
home
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assignments
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, it is common that they have to meet
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Correct article usage
the deadline
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deadline
Fix the agreement mistake
deadlines
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 and
therefore
Linking Words
, by thinking
home
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assignments
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 that they must meet
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deadline
Add an article
the deadline
a deadline
show examples
, they get an
excesive
Correct your spelling
excessive
 amount of
stressed
Change the form of the verb
stress
show examples
, which may lead to depression and insomnia.
AS
Correct your spelling
As
show examples
a result, not only cannot they efficiently do
homework
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 but they would not
also
Linking Words
 study their majors at
schools
Fix the agreement mistake
school
show examples
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there are two major reasons why
home
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assignments
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 should be given to
children
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.
firstIy
Correct your spelling
First
, I believe that doing
homework
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 is helpful for
children
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's academic grades. To explain, students can repeat subjects that learned
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 class when they do
homework
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, which is likely to
rember
Correct your spelling
remember
 them.
Furthermore
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, they would easily understand
like
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apply
show examples
mathematical
method
Fix the agreement mistake
methods
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 and
therefore
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 they will
able
Add a missing verb
be able
show examples
 to answer mathematical problems in
exam
Fix the agreement mistake
exams
show examples
 themselves.
For
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this
Linking Words
 reason, they can get
a higher academic marks
Correct the article-noun agreement
higher academic marks
a higher academic mark
show examples
.
Secondly
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, they can learn about responsibility through
home
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assignments
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.
For example
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, if
children
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 do not
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home
Correct your spelling
have homework
show examples
assignments
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 at
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deadline
Add an article
the deadline
show examples
, it is difficult for them to follow
school
Add an article
the school
show examples
 curriculum and, it is possible for their marks to drop
continuosly
Correct your spelling
continuously
.
Therefore
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, they can recognise not only what should they do but
also
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 who they are. In conclusion,
while
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 it is undeniable that many
children
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stressed
Add a missing verb
are stressed
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 out
while
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 they do
homework
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 and meet a
deadline
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,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 doing
homework
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 has a positive influence on their academic grades and the comprehension of
mathematic
Replace the word
mathematics
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method
Fix the agreement mistake
methods
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. it is indispensable for
children
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.

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task response
Try to ensure complete clarity in expressing your disagreement with the assertion that homework is unnecessary. Your position could be more clearly defined.
task response
Use more specific examples to strengthen your argument about the benefits of homework. Specific cases or studies can add depth to your points.
coherence cohesion
Work on the transitions between the points in your paragraphs for smoother flow. Use linking words effectively to guide the reader through your essay.
coherence cohesion
Elaborate on the reasons why homework may cause stress and how it could be better managed. This will make your argument more compelling.
structure organization
Your introduction and conclusion are well-structured, setting the stage for your discussion and summarizing your opinion clearly.
task response
You've provided a balanced discussion by presenting both sides of the argument regarding homework.
task response
The ideas about responsibility and repeating learned subjects through homework are solid points supporting the task response.
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