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Writing Samples
Band 5

Fresh water has always been a limited resource in some nations of the world. Today, however, growing global demand has turned this problem into a global one. What are the causes behind the increased demand and what steps can goverments and individuals take to address this problem?

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In recent years, the scarcity of freshwater has become a major issue worldwide. With growing demands and diminishing supplies,
this
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 challenge has significant implications for both humanity and the environment. Understanding the causes and addressing
this
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 crisis is vital to ensuring a sustainable future.
To begin
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 with, irregular rainfall patterns, rising temperatures, and prolonged droughts caused by global warming have severely reduced the availability of freshwater. By the way, industrial discharges, agricultural chemicals, and untreated sewage polluted rivers and lakes, making
water
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 unusable.The destruction of forests disrupts natural
water
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 cycles, leading to decreased rainfall and reduced groundwater recharge. When it comes to freshwater scarcity is
adirect
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a direct
 threat to food security, public health, and economic development. To take an example, agriculture, which relies heavily on
water
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, is affected by shortages, leading to food crises.
Additionally
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, contaminated
water
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 sources result in waterborne diseases, causing public health challenges. In conclusion, the global scarcity of fresh
water
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 is a multifaceted problem that requires immediate attention. By addressing the root causes and implementing practical solutions, governments and individuals can work together to safeguard
this
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 precious resource for future generations.

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task achievement
Consider elaborating more on the specific actions that can be taken by governments and individuals to tackle the issue. This would enhance the completeness of your response and provide a clearer, more comprehensive idea to the reader.
coherence cohesion
While the essay is generally well-organized, ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. Focusing on linking sentences can improve the overall flow. Also, some sentences in the third paragraph could be restructured for clearer connections between ideas.
coherence cohesion
You have provided a strong introduction and conclusion, which help frame the essay effectively. Each part introduces and wraps up the essay's main points clearly.
task achievement
The essay identifies several relevant causes of fresh water scarcity, such as global warming effects and pollution, which shows good task response.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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