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Writing Samples
Band 7

The chart below shows the places in which UK people gained access to the Internet from 1998 to 2004. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the rowin features, and make comparisons where relevant. Gia Linh

The chart below shows the places in which UK people gained access to the Internet from 1998 to 2004. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the rowin features, and make comparisons where relevant. Gia Linh
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The bar chart illustrates the percentage of British who connected to the
Internet
Use synonyms
 at four locations, home, work, college, and library between 1998 and 2004.
Overall
Linking Words
, the number of British logged into the
Internet
Use synonyms
 at home increased slightly in the given period
while
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 proportion at work experienced a contrasting movement and became the circumstance with the fewest UK people
Correct pronoun usage
who used
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used
Correct pronoun usage
who used
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 the
Internet
Use synonyms
 in 2004. In 1998, over 50% of UK individuals accessed the
Internet
Use synonyms
 from home, making it the most frequently used location.
This
Linking Words
 proportion rose steadily over the years, reaching just over 55% in 2004.
Conversely
Linking Words
,
Internet
Use synonyms
 access at work started at around 30% in 1998 and experienced a gradual decline, falling to roughly 10% by the end of the period. Accessing the
Internet
Use synonyms
 at colleges remained relatively stable, fluctuating between 20% and around 29%. Library
Fix the agreement mistake
users
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user
Fix the agreement mistake
users
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, which
the
Add a missing verb
is the
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 least popular context, increased slightly over the years, starting at around 10% in 1998 and peaking at just under 15% in 2004

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words internet with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
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