IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some feel governments should invest in preserving minority languages, while others feel this is not a good use of resources. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. (Write 250 words.) ________________

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nobody doubts that
languages
Use synonyms
 are the most important way to communicate in human history. Some
languages
Use synonyms
 still exist and have been wildly used for hundreds or thousands of years. But not all of them managed to survive till today, especially minority
languages
Use synonyms
. Personally, I think that the government should
be
Verb problem
have
show examples
 the main role in supporting any activities related to
language
Use synonyms
 preservation. Not only the minors but
also
Linking Words
 the majors that losing popularity. Creating one
language
Use synonyms
 is much harder than keeping one, it takes a lot of effort and time.
Hence
Linking Words
, I believe it is worth preserving in all aspects. Unfortunately, not every government has the potential to support these kinds of activities. Budget and resources are typically the keys to consider before approving any government project. Developing and least developed countries tend to face more challenges than developed countries. A practical solution might be searching for sponsorships from the private sector or collaborations in terms of CSR activities. Of course, everything changes, nothing remains forever
likewise
Linking Words
languages
Use synonyms
. But what we can do is to choose the way to preserve them. Some may cease as an active speaking
language
Use synonyms
 but before that happens, I think it is possible to keep them as records or books. Each
language
Use synonyms
 has its own uniqueness and always be a crucial part of each culture and history, preserving it in a museum or a library so that we can learn about its story is much better than just keeping it in memory which will fade with time.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement
Ensure that the ideas are directly connected to the question being asked. In the part discussing the role of governments and the potential for private sponsorship, focus more on the implications for preserving minority languages specifically.
Task Achievement
Develop the points on the cultural significance of preserving languages more fully with examples or cases, which would make the argument stronger and showcase a deeper understanding.
Coherence and Cohesion
Improve transitions between ideas to enhance fluidity. For instance, when discussing budget constraints, link it more cohesively to the inability of governments to support language preservation effectively.
Coherence and Cohesion
Consider further developing the initial discussion on whether languages are endangered beyond the mention of historical significance.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay introduces and concludes the argument effectively, framing the topic well within the context of language history and preservation.
Task Achievement
Expresses a clear stance on the importance of government involvement in preserving languages, which is sustained throughout the essay.
Task Achievement
Explores an interesting angle on resource allocation and alternative support, such as private sponsorship, which adds depth to the discussion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: