Some people think that family has the most important influence on children’s development, while others believe that factors such as TV, friends, music and books have a more significant impact. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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The
development
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of a
child
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has always been the
center
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centre
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of focus beside many topics, relating to that a debate has arisen surrounding the primary factor of contribution to one's
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child
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child's
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growing progress, whether it is family or
others
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other
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impacts. In
this
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essay, both of these ideas will be analyzed beforehand coming to
the
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a
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conclusion
of
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from
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writer's
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the writer's
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perspective. To embark on , if we have a deep look at the assertion we will certainly be able to identify myriad reasons why communities believe family has the greatest impact on
children
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's growth . The first and foremost reason is , family is the first school of a
child
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. From the
beginning
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beginning,
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offsprings
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offspring
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spend most of the time with their parents
therefore
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they get the primary lessons from their family .
Furthermore
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,
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children's
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children
show examples
are good
observer
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observers
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.
As a result
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,
children
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observe their parents and adapt their nature and behaviour that's the reason why people believe family play
crucial
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a crucial
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role in
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child's
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a child's
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development
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.
More over
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Moreover
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, spending time with family not only
strengthen
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strengthens
show examples
their bond but
also
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it
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apply
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help them
toh
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to
know their roots deeply . On the paradoxical side , a good number of people believe that
besides
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family other sources like
television
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or friends have
greater
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a greater
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influence on
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child's
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a child's
show examples
development
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. The foremost reason is ,
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television
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that television
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Play
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Plays
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a part and parcel role in our lives .
Television
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provides
huge
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a huge
show examples
range of channels from all over the world which helps them to know about
the
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apply
show examples
other cultures and traditions and
also
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lhelp
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help
helps
them to
leany
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learn
languages . To elaborate, nowadays
children
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watches
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watch
show examples
cartoons in English which helps them to learn
language
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a language
the language
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at
very
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a very
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young age . Take example my brother , his first language is Bangla but he used to watch cartoons in English when he was young and from
very
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a very
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young age he learnt to speak in English because of the cartoon shows he used to watch. It's really helped him in his academic years .
Furthermore
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, spending time with
peees
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pets
pes
can
devlope
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develop
communications
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communication
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skills,
team work
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teamwork
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, leadership and many more . They get to meet new people at every stage and learn from them which helps them to grow
in
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into
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a successful person .
To sum up
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, family and
others
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other
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sources like
tv
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TV
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,
peers
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and peers
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both have their importance . Family plays a crucial role in the initial stages of a
child
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's
development
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, providing emotional support, moral guidance, and shaping early learning experiences.External factors like
television
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and friends begin to exert a greater influence as
children
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grow older, expanding their social circles beyond the family. As far as I can see it can be said that external factors
ha
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have
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the greatest influence on
children
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's
devlopment
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development
.
Submitted by caivankihh779 on

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language
Try to maintain a consistent tense usage throughout the essay to avoid confusing the reader.
coherence
Strengthen logical transitions between paragraphs to enhance the logical flow of the essay.
cohesion
Ensure that the examples provided strongly tie back to the main point being discussed for clarity.
task achievement
The essay addresses both views of the debate comprehensively and presents a clear opinion at the end.
structure
The introduction and conclusion provide a solid framework for the essay.
clarity
Examples are used to support the points made, helping to clarify the argument.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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