Many people are afraid to leave their homes because of the fear of crime. Why do you think people are so fearful these days? Do the merits of such a cautions approach outweigh the demerits.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It has been observed that in the wake of burgeoning crimes nowadays a number of individuals are scared to step out of their houses. Many reasons are behind
this
Linking Words
doubt of the crowd. From my perspective, the demerits of
this
Linking Words
development surely outweigh the merits, which will be discussed in the upcoming paragraphs. Among all of the factors accountable for rendering the community fearful, even, in their surroundings, the prominent is the media. In an attempt to make citizens aware of the miscreants, somewhere, they are frightening them with the presenting of the news in an extreme manner.
For instance
Linking Words
, various news channels often broadcast offence-related news in an aggressive way like showing the mess created by offenders and injured victims in burglaries as dramatic scenes, which, in turn, affect the spectators so badly that they begin to feel unsafe in their vicinity. One evident benefit of
this
Linking Words
approach is that the public remains alert when they step out in public places. Undoubtedly, it is quite difficult these days to trust any stranger, especially during travelling alone.
Therefore
Linking Words
, being suspicious in public areas, one may be able to point out an offender quickly and
consequently
Linking Words
, report to the police officials. In
this
Linking Words
way, future mishappening might be stopped before occurring, which may prove beneficial in curbing the offences as well.
However
Linking Words
, by remaining fearful all the time, the family would not be able to make appropriate decisions about others. Owing to
this
Linking Words
, under the wrong suspicions, not only they would malign the image of an innocent person, but
also
Linking Words
the crucial time of police authorities can be wasted. Yet another demerit of
this
Linking Words
aspect is that with afraid every time can be detrimental to the mental health of the citizens.
This
Linking Words
is primarily the fact that
such
Linking Words
an approach can prove disadvantageous for the community in case of being confined indoors
due to
Linking Words
the anxiety of criminals.
As a result
Linking Words
, they begin to view, even, their close ones in suspicion because of being engulfed by the stress of miscreants.
To conclude
Linking Words
although
Linking Words
alarm about crime brings awareness in individuals about the offences committed,
still
Add a comma
still,
show examples
I believe that it has more demerits in terms of mental health and spreading wrong information in
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society, which certainly needs to be stopped, specifically by the media, who has a huge role in creating
this
Linking Words
apprehension in the minds of
nation
Add an article
the nation
a nation
show examples
.
Submitted by sanjanasharma1905 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Make sure to use a broader range of linking words to improve the logical flow of your essay. This will enhance coherence by highlighting the relationship between different points.
task achievement
Include more specific examples to better illustrate your points and make your arguments more convincing. This will strengthen your task achievement.
task achievement
Try to simplify some complex sentences, as they can become hard to follow. Expressing your ideas clearly will help maintain reader interest and improve your score.
task achievement
Your essay presents a clear response to both parts of the task, addressing why people are fearful and weighing the merits versus demerits.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-structured with a clear introduction and conclusion, helping guide the reader through your argument.
task achievement
You effectively highlight media influence as a cause of fear, which is a strong point in your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • fear of crime
  • public perception
  • media influence
  • exaggerated incidents
  • technology and connectivity
  • heightened sense of fear
  • lack of personal experience
  • social pressure
  • communal stories
  • preventative measures
  • diminished quality of life
  • limited social interactions
  • being cautious
  • opportunities and experiences
  • personal growth
  • exercise caution
  • genuine threats
  • safety and security
  • shared anxiety
  • heightened fear
What to do next:
Look at other essays: