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Writing Samples
Band 6

The modern-day world is growing more and more dependent on technology. What technologies do you think are going to be important in near future?

#world #technology #technologies #future
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Nowadays world is
turning
Verb problem
becoming
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 more and more addicted
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
 technical equipment. There are almost some technologies that we are already using,
however
Linking Words
 in
future
Use synonyms
 mainly three of them play a central role. First of all, I would like to mention the phones as much as possible. Currently, we already use them for many purposes, and every year science allows us to improve and include even more options and make it even more convenient.
For example
Linking Words
, we use the phone for communication,
search
Wrong verb form
searching
show examples
, as an album for memories, as an opportunity to study, do homework, and much more, but in the
Use synonyms
future
Add a comma
future,
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 the phone will be even more advanced and it will
also
Linking Words
 include other categories from our
lives
Use synonyms
,
such
Linking Words
 as car control, home, personal assistant. The second equally important one is artificial intelligence . In
this
Linking Words
 period of time, not everyone is still using it and can apply all its possibilities in their
lives
Use synonyms
, but most are already using it as their teacher, psychologist, nutritionist, coach, and so on in all areas. In the
future
Use synonyms
, artificial intelligence will be introduced into cars and homes, so people's
lives
Use synonyms
 will be easier and they will not have to make many decisions and think about the consequences.
As the
Change preposition
The
show examples
last
Linking Words
 example, which is not particularly advanced, but in the
future
Use synonyms
 will take pride of place among our addictions
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 smart
glasses
Use synonyms
. It is already possible to receive notifications, make content, watch movies and Internet pages, but
this
Linking Words
 technology is being improved as much as possible.
Thus
Linking Words
, in the
future
Use synonyms
, we will use smart
glasses
Use synonyms
 in the field of medicine for the diagnosis and treatment of patients, education for interactive lessons, production for process management, sports for activity analysis and training, entertainment, security,
trade
Correct word choice
and trade
show examples
. Using these examples, we can see how smart
glasses
Use synonyms
 will be a part of our
lives
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, the 21st century is a century of technology, and in the near
future
Use synonyms
, phones, artificial intelligence, smart
glasses
Use synonyms
, and many other technologies will play an important role.
Submitted by zeynalli.tarana on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Try to use more cohesive devices (linking words and phrases) to provide even smoother transitions between ideas and paragraphs, enhancing the flow of your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Consider expanding the introduction and conclusion to provide a stronger overview of the topics discussed and to leave the reader with a solid summary or call to action.
Task Achievement
Be careful of small inaccuracies or awkward phrasing that might disrupt the reader's understanding slightly. Reviewing those areas could enhance clarity.
Task Achievement
The essay provides a clear and complete response to the prompt, addressing future technologies like phones, artificial intelligence, and smart glasses effectively.
Task Achievement
The essay includes relevant and specific examples to support main points, such as the potential uses of smart glasses in various fields.
Coherence and Cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is well-organized, with each paragraph focusing on a specific technology and its future implications.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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