Today many children and teenagers are overweight and unhealthy. Give reasons to explain why many young people are obese and give some solutions to fix the problem.

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Infants and youths these days are prone to overweight and unhealthy lifestyles

due to

Linking Words

unbalanced diets. In

this

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essay, the causes of the above topic will be discussed. There are a plethora of factors why kids nowadays are gaining weight.

To begin

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with,

due to

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the advancement of mobile phones, youngsters have easy access to phones and laptops which leads to increased screen time.

Hence

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, most of their time is around sitting or lying down which can cause obesity.

Moreover

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, attention from parents is crucial for children's diet.

For instance

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, children who eat deserts often can be affected with diabetes. A plethora of solutions to overcome these issues.

First,

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introduce them to sports and other physical activities that allow them to be active.

Secondly

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, parents need to monitor the daily menu for their children to ensure

balanced

Correct article usage

a balanced

show examples

diets

Fix the agreement mistake

diet

show examples

For example

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, every meal needs to have vegetables.

To conclude

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, parents and the community can come forward and help teenagers to combat overweight and unhealthy lifestyles.

Submitted by alifahrc on Wed Jan 15 2025

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task achievement

To enhance your task response score, try to provide a more comprehensive exploration of the reasons behind obesity in youth. Include other factors such as the impact of fast food, lack of physical education in schools, or societal pressures.

coherence cohesion

To improve your coherence and cohesion, consider using a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect your ideas and create smoother transitions between your points.

coherence cohesion

Your essay has a strong introduction and conclusion, providing a clear framework for your arguments.

task achievement

You have effectively identified two main issues contributing to obesity, which helps in structuring your essay well.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

164 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Sedentary lifestyle
Screen time
Balanced diet
Nutrients
Physical education
Parental influence
Aggressive marketing
Emotional stress
Coping mechanism
Caloric intake
Processed foods
Nutrient-dense
Health awareness
Fast food industry

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Today many children and teenagers are overweight and unhealthy. Give reasons to explain why many young people are obese and give some solutions to fix the problem.

Word Count

Nowadays children watch a lot of TV and play video games. However, some people think that activities are not good for a child’s mental health. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that competitive sports are important for a child education, others think that it has negative effects. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people believe that the experience children have before they go to school will have the greatest effect on their future life. Others argue that experiences gained when they are teenagers have a bigger influence. Discuss both views and give your opinions.

Some people think social media have a negative impact do you agree or not

In some countries, students pay their college or university fees, while in some others, the government pays for them. Do the advantages of governments paying for fees outweigh the disadvantages?