Today many children and teenagers are overweight and unhealthy. Give reasons to explain why many young people are obese and give some solutions to fix the problem.

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Infants and youths these days are prone to overweight and unhealthy lifestyles
due to
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unbalanced diets. In
this
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essay, the causes of the above topic will be discussed. There are a plethora of factors why kids nowadays are gaining weight.
To begin
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with,
due to
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the advancement of mobile phones, youngsters have easy access to phones and laptops which leads to increased screen time.
Hence
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, most of their time is around sitting or lying down which can cause obesity.
Moreover
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, attention from parents is crucial for children's diet.
For instance
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, children who eat deserts often can be affected with diabetes. A plethora of solutions to overcome these issues.
First,
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introduce them to sports and other physical activities that allow them to be active.
Secondly
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, parents need to monitor the daily menu for their children to ensure
balanced
Correct article usage
a balanced
show examples
diets
Fix the agreement mistake
diet
show examples
.
For example
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, every meal needs to have vegetables.
To conclude
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, parents and the community can come forward and help teenagers to combat overweight and unhealthy lifestyles.
Submitted by alifahrc on

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task achievement
To enhance your task response score, try to provide a more comprehensive exploration of the reasons behind obesity in youth. Include other factors such as the impact of fast food, lack of physical education in schools, or societal pressures.
coherence cohesion
To improve your coherence and cohesion, consider using a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect your ideas and create smoother transitions between your points.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a strong introduction and conclusion, providing a clear framework for your arguments.
task achievement
You have effectively identified two main issues contributing to obesity, which helps in structuring your essay well.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Sedentary lifestyle
  • Screen time
  • Balanced diet
  • Nutrients
  • Physical education
  • Parental influence
  • Aggressive marketing
  • Emotional stress
  • Coping mechanism
  • Caloric intake
  • Processed foods
  • Nutrient-dense
  • Health awareness
  • Fast food industry
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