IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In several nation, smoking in public areas considered illegal now, some argue that is resonable. This essay completely agrees with this statement because banning smoking in such areas can reduce health problems and environmental issues.

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In several
nation
Change to a plural noun
nations
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, smoking in public
areas
Use synonyms
considered
Add a missing verb
is considered
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 illegal now, some argue
that is
Linking Words
resonable
Correct your spelling
reasonable
.
This
Linking Words
 essay completely agrees with
this
Linking Words
 statement because banning smoking in
such
Linking Words
areas
Use synonyms
 can reduce
health
Use synonyms
 problems and environmental
issues
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. Smoking
Add a missing verb
is
show examples
known to be harmful and can cause cancer and long-lasting diseases. Banning smoking in public
areas
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 can help reduce smoking addiction, as
people
Use synonyms
 tend to follow the law and may choose
not
Add the particle
not to
show examples
 smoke.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
people
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 are often busy and can not afford to miss meetings or be late for
an
Correct article usage
apply
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appoitments
Correct your spelling
appointment
appointments
. Since they are
notallowed
Correct your spelling
not allowed
 to smoke in public
areas
Use synonyms
,
this
Linking Words
 could
let
Verb problem
lead
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 to
reduction
Add an article
a reduction
the reduction
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 in smoking
habbit
Correct your spelling
habit
habits
, which means lower
health
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issues
Use synonyms
due to
Linking Words
 smoking.
For example
Linking Words
, Norway banned smoking in public places,
resulted
Wrong verb form
resulting
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 in fewer
people
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 smoking Another point to consider is that smoking is very harmful to the environment. Cigarette waste pollutes water, land, and air
due to
Linking Words
 its toxic chemicals. The more
people
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 smoke, the more
pollution
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issues
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 arise.
For instance
Linking Words
, statistics show that over 4.5 billion cigarette butts were found in the sea, making it a significant source of marine
pollution
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. Another point to consider, smoking is very dangerous to our
environments
Fix the agreement mistake
environment
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.
Cigarites
Correct your spelling
Cigarettes
 waste pollutes water, land and air
due to
Linking Words
 its toxic chemical. The more
people
Use synonyms
 are smoking
the more
Rephrase
,
show examples
 the more
pollution
Use synonyms
issues
Use synonyms
 arise.
For instance
Linking Words
,
statstcs
Correct your spelling
statistics
 show over 4.5
billions
Change to singular
billion
show examples
cigarites
Correct your spelling
cigarette
cigarettes
 butts were found in the sea, making it a significant source of marine
pollution
Use synonyms
.
To conclude
Linking Words
, cigarettes are harmful to both
health
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 and the planet. Prohibiting smoking in public places can have a positive impact on our lives, land, air, and
overall
Linking Words
health
Use synonyms

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task achievement
Ensure the introduction clearly states all the main points that will be discussed, providing a roadmap for the essay.
coherence cohesion
Consider varying sentence structures and using linking words to enhance coherence and cohesion.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repetition of points and ensure each paragraph brings a unique perspective to the argument.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion effectively present and wrap up the main argument, providing clarity to the essay's purpose.
task achievement
Your essay responds well to the task by discussing both health and environmental impacts, covering the two areas of concern.
task achievement
The provided example of Norway gives a concrete context, enhancing the essay's persuasiveness.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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