IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

In some countries more and more international travel is becoming cheaper and more countries are opening their doors to increase the number of tourists. Do the advantages of increasing tourism outweigh the disadvantage.

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In
few
Correct article usage
a few
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 countries, international travel is becoming more affordable and many nations are welcoming new tourists to increase the number. Even though
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 there are advantages like
increase
Correct article usage
an increase
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 in
Use synonyms
country's
Correct article usage
the country's
show examples
 economy and popularity, it comes with downsides like overcrowding and increased
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
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 of local products. On the positive side, tourism contributes a major role in the improvement of
countries
Replace the word
a country's
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 economy.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 often
do
Verb problem
make
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 purchases from local
market
Fix the agreement mistake
markets
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 which
also
Linking Words
boost
Correct subject-verb agreement
boosts
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 sales of local products.
For example
Linking Words
, Thailand sells most of the local goods to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tourists which
plays
Change the verb form
play
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significant
Add an article
a significant
show examples
 role in
their
Change the word
the
show examples
country
Use synonyms
's development.
In addition
Linking Words
 to that, visiting more
people
Use synonyms
 increases the popularity of the
country
Use synonyms
attracts
Correct word choice
and attracts
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 more
people
Use synonyms
 from
the
Change preposition
around the
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 world. On the negative side, Tourist
attraction
Fix the agreement mistake
attractions
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 places are always crowded and there might be chances of law and order
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
. Sometimes, cultural differences
with
Change preposition
between
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tourist
Fix the agreement mistake
tourists
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 and locals can cause arguments and assaults.
For instance
Linking Words
, in countries like
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
India, beef eating is prohibited in some places but some
tourist
Fix the agreement mistake
tourists
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 like to eat beef there, which in turn causes cultural problems.
Due to
Linking Words
 increased demand, local product prices
raise
Correct your spelling
rise
show examples
 which
also
Linking Words
 affects native
people
Use synonyms
. In conclusion,
inspite
Correct your spelling
in spite
 of some cons,
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
show examples
 of tourism
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the
country
Use synonyms
 always outweigh the disadvantages. With proper rules and
regulations
Add a comma
regulations,
show examples
 tourism offers great benefits to the
country
Use synonyms
as well as
Linking Words
local
Correct article usage
the local
show examples
 community.

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task achievement
While your response addresses both advantages and disadvantages and comes to a conclusion, it would benefit from a more balanced discussion on each side to fully achieve the task. Try to provide equal weight and depth to both advantages and disadvantages.
coherence cohesion
Ensure coherence by using more linking words and phrases to smoothly transition between ideas and within paragraphs. This will help maintain the logical flow of your essay.
coherence cohesion
You provided a clear introduction and a conclusive paragraph that summarizes your argument effectively, which is crucial for a well-rounded essay.
coherence cohesion
Your paragraphing is effective, with distinct sections addressing both advantages and disadvantages, contributing to a well-organized response.
task achievement
You used relevant examples, such as Thailand and India, to support your points which provide clarity and add value to your arguments.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • economic benefits
  • job creation
  • hospitality sector
  • cultural exchange
  • diversity
  • infrastructure
  • public services
  • environmental degradation
  • ecosystems
  • overcrowding
  • cultural erosion
  • commercialization
  • authenticity
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