Some people think watching TV is bad for children in every way. Others think it is good for developing children as they grow up. Discuss both of these views and give your own opinion.

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A few individuals think

observing

Verb problem

watching

show examples

Use synonyms

is terrible for

children

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in each way. Others think it is nice for creating

children

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as they develop

Change preposition

apply

show examples

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss both of these views and essentially,it will be finished by involving my own perspective.

To begin

Linking Words

with,excessive

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watching can lead to a sedentary lifestyle. Many

children

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spend hours in front of screens, which can result in obesity and associated health problems.

Children

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who watch more than two hours of

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each day tend to have poorer physical health compared to their peers who engage in physical activities.Too much television can negatively impact social skills.

For instance

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,80% of

children

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watch

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instead

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of interacting with others, they miss out on important experiences that teach them communication and empathy.

Conversely

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, proponents of television argue that it can be a valuable educational tool. In recent years, many educational programs have emerged that can contribute positively to a child's learning experience.Especially nowadays it's really popular and used a lot.

For example

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,there is

Correct article usage

the

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film "Wonder",

this

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film gives a lot.It's about the health problems of a boy who is trying to cope with them and find friends.Stumbling over the betrayal of his best friend and the death of his beloved pet.

This

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film is really instructive and teaches a lot, developing thinking and imagination. In conclusion,the impact of television on

children

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is a complex issue with valid arguments on both sides. In my opinion,when you do something normally and spend an average amount of time on it,

then

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everything is useful.

As well as

Linking Words

spending time in front of the screen, it may come in handy

sometime

Fix the agreement mistake

sometimes

show examples

i.nureddinnSat Jan 18 2025

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task achievement

Ensure all examples clearly relate to the point being discussed.

coherence cohesion

Consider varying sentence structures for better flow.

coherence cohesion

Avoid minor grammatical issues such as missing articles.

task achievement

You present a balanced view on both sides of the argument.

task achievement

You effectively use examples, such as the "Wonder" film, to illustrate points.

coherence cohesion

Your essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, enhancing coherence.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

269 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Negative effects
Physical health
Mental health
Excessive
Sedentary lifestyle
Obesity
Attention span
Cognitive development
Inappropriate
Violence
Unrealistic expectations
Educational
Informative
Knowledge
Learning abilities
Diverse cultures
Languages
Experiences
Values
Life lessons
Bonding
Moderation
Parental guidance
Entertainment benefits

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