In many cities the construction of new houses and office buildings is not controlled. This leads to people building in whatever style they want without thinking about design. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?
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What works well
3Good attempt at structuring the essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
The essay mentions some important disadvantages of uncontrolled construction, such as environmental impact and loss of recreational areas.
Conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and the position is stated.
Improvement Suggestions
3Improve the logical flow by ensuring that each paragraph focuses on a singular clear idea. Use transitional expressions or linking words to smoothly guide the reader through your points.
Clarify your thesis statement and ensure it directly answers the question – whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. Reinforce this throughout your body paragraphs.
Provide more detailed and specific examples to support your points. This will strengthen your argument and make your points more persuasive.
Include an introduction and conclusion
A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.
The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.
The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:
- Summary
- Restatement of thesis
- Prediction or recommendation
Example:
To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.
Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:
- In conclusion
- To conclude
- To summarize
- Finally
- In a nutshell
- In general