People after retirement often require financial assistance. Should the government be responsible for this or should the individuals make provisions for themselves? Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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After retirement, many
people
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find that they need financial assistance to live comfortably. There is a debate about whether the
government
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should provide
this
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support or if
individuals
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should make their own financial provisions. On the one hand, some
people
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believe that the
government
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should be responsible for providing financial support to retired
individuals
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. The main reason is that
people
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work hard throughout their lives and contribute to the country’s economy.
Therefore
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, when they retire, they should be able to rely on the
government
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to ensure a decent standard of living. Many
retirees
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have limited income, and without
government
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help, they may face financial hardship. Governments can offer pensions or other forms of financial assistance to help
retirees
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live without worry.
On the other hand
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, some
people
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argue that
individuals
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should make their own financial provisions for
retrement
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retirement
. They
beleve
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believe
that it is important for
people
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to plan ahead and save money during their working years. By setting aside savings or investing in pension schemes,
individuals
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can ensure that they have enough money when they retire.
This
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approach encourages responsibility and reduces the financial burden on the
government
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. It
also
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allows
individuals
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to have more control over their retirement funds and how they are spent. In my opinion, the
government
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should provide some support to
retirees
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, but
individuals
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must
also
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take responsibility for their financial future. It is important for
people
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to plan and save, but the
government
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can offer a safety net for those who need extra help. In conclusion, both the
government
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and
individuals
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have roles to play in ensuring that
retirees
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are financially supported. The
government
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can provide assistance, but
individuals
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should
also
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prepare for their retirement.

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coherence cohesion
The essay presents a clear introduction, well-developed body paragraphs, and a strong conclusion, contributing to a high score in coherence and cohesion.
task achievement
The argument is logically structured, with balanced discussion on both sides of the debate, showcasing good task achievement.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial assistance
  • retirement
  • provisions
  • governmental pension plans
  • social security
  • welfare programs
  • financial literacy
  • private pensions
  • savings accounts
  • investments
  • economic stability
  • poverty line
  • safety net
  • personal responsibility
  • incentivizing
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