IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Write a letter to your supervisor regarding a course you attended as a part of your job. Write - The purpose of your letter - Say how the course was useful to you - What are your suggestions regarding the course

#supervisor #course #part #job #purpose #suggestions
Dear Sir/Madam I hope
this
 letter finds you well. I am writing
this
 letter to tell you about the
course
 which I completed
this
 week as
this
course
 is a part of my job. As you know I am working in a superstore as a cashier,
therefore
,
therefore
 I need a good communication skill to talk with every customer.
Hence
, completing
this
 professional language
course
 not only improved my communication skills but
also
 enhanced my knowledge of English.
Moreover
, after completing
this
course
 now I can apply for a front desk job as a senior cashier .
In addition
 to
this
, I want to thank you for giving me
this
 opportunity . I feel lucky to have a senior like you in the role of my supervisor at my work.
Besides
this
 , I want to give some suggestions about
this
course
 .As
this
course
 duration only lasts for two weeks I believe that
course
 should
last
 for two months minimum because Learning English is not easy . Looking forward to hearing a positive and prompt response from your side. Yours sincerely
Submitted by navdeepbajaj89 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure consistency in punctuations such as spacing after commas and periods.
Task Achievement
Provide more specific examples of how the course content will be applied in your job role.
Coherence and Cohesion
The letter has a clear structure with distinct sections for each task requirement.
Task Achievement
The writing tone is polite and suitable for a professional communication with a supervisor.
Coherence and Cohesion
The greeting and closing are appropriately formal and suitable.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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