It is argued that getting married before finishing school or getting a job is not a good choice. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
People believe that it is not a good option to have a family before completing school first or getting a job. I strongly agree with
this
argument because there are factors that will only lead the married couple to get a divorce Linking Words
such
as mental health and the economy.
On the one hand, getting married before completing school first will leave them mentally unstable. Linking Words
Although
the students are only taught about some general subjects like mathematics and sciences, Linking Words
thus
, they Linking Words
also
learn how to socialize with friends, teachers, Linking Words
as well as
older people. Not getting Linking Words
this
kind of lesson means they are not ready to fall into the real world. Linking Words
For example
, a recent study proves that couples who have not finished their study are most likely to divorce in no more than 2 years after starting a family.
Linking Words
On the other hand
, having married before getting a job means that they will not have any money. Being married is not only about living together, it is about a new responsibility. They need to consider where will they live and what will they eat, Linking Words
hence
, all of these things need a lot of money. Linking Words
This
situation may lead to some problems, Linking Words
for instance
, I have seen many cases about the ultimate factor that leads a couple to get divorced is the economy.
In conclusion, there are many reasons why people should not get married before being both mentally and economically stable because these things will only lead them to a divorce.Linking Words
Submitted by dorima
on
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Coherence
To improve coherence, make sure each paragraph smoothly transitions from one idea to the next. Consider using phrases that connect the different reasons why early marriage might be problematic.
Task Achievement
Add more detailed examples or statistics to support your main points. This will strengthen your argument and make it more convincing.
Introduction and Conclusion Presence
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame the main argument effectively.
Clear Comprehensive Ideas
The main argument is well-explained, with clear reasons provided for why getting married early could lead to divorce.