More and more serious crimes seem to be committed each year. Some think that the death penalty is the best way to deal with this problem while other people think different measures are more likely to be successful. Discuss both options.

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Many kinds of
criems
Correct your spelling
crimes
happen in society
per
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a
Correct determiner usage
every
show examples
year, and a lot of
Use synonyms
people's
Change noun form
people
show examples
idea is
death
Use synonyms
is
major
Add an article
a major
the major
show examples
solution
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
these troubles.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, some crowd's opinion is
death
Use synonyms
is not
only
Add an article
the only
show examples
way to
solve
Correct pronoun usage
solve it
show examples
,
also
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different
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
show examples
of laws can be more useful. First and foremost,
Use synonyms
death
Add an article
the death
show examples
penalty has a really big
impacts
Correct the article-noun agreement
impact
show examples
on
public
Add an article
the public
a public
show examples
system.
Fisrt
Correct your spelling
First
effect is fear. If
people
Use synonyms
face
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
death
Use synonyms
, they think
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
Correct article usage
the concequences
show examples
concequences
Correct your spelling
consequences
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, many
group
Change to a plural noun
groups
show examples
of
people
Use synonyms
try to fix their mistakes and faults.
For example
Linking Words
, when
Use synonyms
death
Correct article usage
the death
show examples
law
announced
Add a missing verb
was announced
show examples
in the UK, crime rates
are decrease
Wrong verb form
decreased
show examples
so
quick
Change the word
quickly
show examples
.
As a result
Linking Words
, strong laws can border to a lot of murders and theft cases.
Secondly
Linking Words
, some rules can
really
Add a missing verb
be really
show examples
useful for
set
Change the verb form
setting
show examples
up to
humanity
Replace the word
human
show examples
system
such
Linking Words
as
die
Replace the word
death
show examples
punishment.
In addition
Linking Words
, everybody wants to be alive, and all
people
Use synonyms
wants
Change the verb form
want
show examples
to live with
happines
Correct your spelling
happiness
but
death
Use synonyms
law is
border
Add an article
the border
a border
show examples
to these.
Hence
Linking Words
, nobody wants to pass away.
This
Linking Words
system not only
limit
Correct subject-verb agreement
limits
show examples
to amount of crimes
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but
also
Linking Words
, many
group
Change to a plural noun
groups
show examples
of
Use synonyms
people's
Change noun form
people
show examples
just can
Wrong verb form
to
show examples
protect
from
Correct pronoun usage
themselves from
show examples
criminals. It causes, respect
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
each
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
population.
For instance
Linking Words
, Canada included
this
Linking Words
method
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
laws by
president
Add an article
the president
show examples
while
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,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
theft numbers fell
down
Change preposition
apply
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, the biggest part of prisons can fix to public's development process. A lot of
criminal
Change to a plural noun
criminals
show examples
can be
volunteer
Fix the agreement mistake
volunteers
show examples
for humans. Initally, Africa has
large
Correct article usage
a large
show examples
porcion
Correct your spelling
population
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
murders
Replace the word
murderers
show examples
and
theifs
Correct your spelling
thieves
, rather than
they try
Wrong verb form
trying
show examples
to direct the
prisons
Change noun form
prison's
show examples
life
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
good
Change the article
a good
show examples
way.
To sum up
Linking Words
, some
people
Use synonyms
can be productive and we should save them from illegal activities. In conclusion, killing
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
guilty
people
Use synonyms
can be
great
Add an article
a great
show examples
choice since
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
if somebody
Add a missing verb
is scare
show examples
scare
Replace the word
scared
show examples
to
do
Verb problem
commit
show examples
crime
Correct article usage
a crime
show examples
, the accident case will
be finish
Change the verb form
be finished
show examples
.
In contrast
Linking Words
, we can find some volunteers from guilties.

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coherence cohesion
Work on developing a clearer logical structure for your essay to improve coherence. Use clear topic sentences and transitions for each paragraph.
coherence cohesion
Take time to sharpen the conclusion by summarizing the main points more effectively to reinforce your argument.
task achievement
Clarify your ideas and expand on your arguments to make your task response more comprehensive. Address all aspects of the task clearly.
task achievement
You've made a good attempt to cover both perspectives of the death penalty debate.
coherence cohesion
There is an introduction and a conclusion, creating a sense of completeness in your essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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