Some people believe that the government should shoulder the responsibility of providing economic support for the arts.On the contrary, opponents suggest that healthcare and education should be given priority instead.There seem to be valid reasons on both sides of the argument.

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Most argue that it is not the responsibility of the ministry to offer the provision of funding to arts and believe that it is better to spend money on healthcare and education. I completely agree with
this
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opinion and think that humanistic disciplines are crucial for society in the same way.
Firstly
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, governments are formed for the betterment of society.
Moreover
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, arts contribute to the development of the culture of some nations. It is important because culture designs the identity of individuals and creates skills for maintaining the folklore of social groups.
For example
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, Colombia's authority has designed a program which tries to keep alive the Bambuco music, it is a typical music in Tolima's region and is a crucial part of citizens. In
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way, Tolima's people keep their traditional roots thanks to programs focused on creative activities .
On the other hand
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, nations must spend money on medical management and brainwashing which are essential human rights. It is crucial for people who do not have enough resources.
For instance
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, Colombia has several regions where poor populations need a deep intervention in healthcare and education, it is a specific case in which authorities must tackle the issue.
Finally
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,
this
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kind of problem has been focused on helping society.
To conclude
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,
although
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medical management and education are crucial for individuals, artworks are
also
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paramount in civilization. In my opinion, the ministry should spend money on programs which help to develop artwork to keep the people's identity and knowledge about their roots and their ancestors.
Submitted by mariajoser3 on

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task achievement
Ensure a clearer distinction between your arguments and opposing views in the introduction to strengthen your position.
coherence and cohesion
Work on improving paragraph connectivity for smoother transitions between points.
task achievement
Elaborate on examples by explaining their significance to enhance your main points.
task achievement
Your essay presents a thoughtful exploration of the topic, addressing both sides effectively.
task achievement
Each main point is supported with relevant examples, especially the one about Colombia's arts program.
coherence and cohesion
You have a well-structured essay with a clear introduction and conclusion.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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