IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

people spend most of there time at work in their adult life, so work satiffaction seems to be important. on what factor it depend. to what extent expectation of work satifscation is justified.

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People spend most of their time during adolescence at
workplace
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the workplace
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 so the level of
satisfaction
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 from their jobs is of significant importance to maintain mental and physical health.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss
that
Correct word choice
apply
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how factors like salary and working
hours
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 affect
job
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satisfaction
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.
Moreover
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,
level
Correct article usage
the level
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 of
satisfaction
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 from
work
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 certainly depends on
an
Correct article usage
the
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in
Change preposition
apply
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Use synonyms
individuals
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individual's
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 type of
work
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. The amount of finances being offered and how many
hours
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 of
work
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 are demanded determine
ones’
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one’s
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satisfaction
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 in his
work
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.
Therefore
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, employees with high salary packages and
less
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fewer
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hours
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 of
work
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seems
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seem
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 to have better
job
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contentment
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 than other employees because
high
Correct article usage
a high
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 salary guarantees more purchasing power.
In addition
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, a schedule comprising of low working
hours
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also
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 enhances
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individuals
Change noun form
individuals'
individual's
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 mental
aspect
Fix the agreement mistake
aspects
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about
Change preposition
of
show examples
Use synonyms
job
Add an article
the job
a job
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.
For instance
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,
according to
Linking Words
 a survey conducted in India in 2015 clearly indicated
high
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a high
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 level of
job
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contentment
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 for high earners than
labor
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labour
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 workers. The opinion that anyone can reach
contentment
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 in
work
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 is not definitely true because it depends on an
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individuals
Change to a genitive case
individual's
show examples
 allowances.
Individuals
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on
Change preposition
of
show examples
 high status or positions
are seemed
Change to the active voice
seem
have seemed
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 to be
highly
Correct quantifier usage
more highly
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 contended
Linking Words
then
Correct your spelling
than
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 those
of
Change preposition
in
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 lower positions because low position demands more submission to others and physical stress.
For example
Linking Words
, a study conducted by business school graduates shows that high rank employees seem to complain less than those of lower ranks in
Use synonyms
job
Add an article
the job
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 market. In conclusion,
fulfillment
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fulfilment
show examples
 of expectations from a
job
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 contributes to major aspects
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
job
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contentment
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 which depends on factors like high wages, low to moderate
hours
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 of working and less physical and mental stress.

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task response
Aim to focus more on the task by ensuring complete responses to all parts of the question. You touched on several factors for job satisfaction, but there was room for deeper exploration of each factor.
coherence
Enhance coherence through the use of clear linking words and phrases to improve the logical structure of your essay. This will aid in guiding the reader through your ideas more smoothly.
task response
Provide more detailed and specific examples to support your points. The use of relatable instances can strengthen your arguments and make them clearer to the reader.
coherence
The essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, which frames your discussion well.
coherence
The general structure of your essay maintains a logical flow from introduction through to conclusion.
task response
You addressed both factors affecting job satisfaction and the varying levels of satisfaction among different positions, which shows a comprehensive approach to the topic.
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