Some people think that teenagers who commit crimes should be treated the same way as adult criminals. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There is a different reasons for these people some of them
consdered
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considered
as a
victom
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victims
and they are talk from the
emotinal
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emotional
moment
while
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the others of them
gives
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give
show examples
opinion
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opinions
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based on law judgemental list and have a
misbehave
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misbehaving
show examples
concern
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concerns
show examples
.
This
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topic is a tough thing to spell
your
Change preposition
out your
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idea or give some solutions
because
Fix the infinitive
to because
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it
have
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has
show examples
emotional
Correct article usage
an emotional
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impact
for
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on
show examples
everyone even the ones who
did
Verb problem
are
show examples
not attached with in anyway of situation. When we go back to
root
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the root
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of
this
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subject we are going to
mixed
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be mixed
show examples
up with a lot and many types of parents teaching
behave
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behaviour
show examples
to their child and after
that
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that,
show examples
you were
relaise
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realise
how big is
this
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problem.
Overall
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in my opinion actually I believe that there
is
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are
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exptional
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exceptional
cases
from
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of
show examples
these young people and they just want to
redirction
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redirection
them to peace and passion way in their life and they
well
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will
show examples
be a good
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
and make an
affect
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effect
show examples
in their
socitiy
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society
.
Submitted by Mohammed on

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coherence cohesion
Work on linking your ideas more effectively to improve coherence and cohesion. Consider using connectors or transition phrases to make your paragraphs flow more logically.
task achievement
Try to develop your ideas more comprehensively and provide specific examples or evidence. This can help in demonstrating a thorough understanding of the topic.
task achievement
The essay touches upon a complex and emotionally charged topic, demonstrating an understanding that it can be sensitive for many people.
coherence cohesion
There is a presence of an introduction and a conclusion, making the essay feel more rounded and complete.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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