Levels of depression and antisocial behavior in children have increased dramatically in modern societies. This situation has led many people to believe that childhood itself is in crisis. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

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In
todays
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today's
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world, childhood
face
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faces
show examples
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
of psychological
difficalties
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difficulties
that
rised
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rose
rise
risen
dramatically during the past few years.For
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instance
instante
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instante,
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i
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I
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agreed
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agree
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since the crisis faced the majority of them
although
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, a huge weight of
this
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issue
parents
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the main responsible. At the onset, there is
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a sharpe
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sharpe
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sharp
increased
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increase
show examples
in the number of young people
suffer
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suffering
show examples
from depression and autism.On the one
hands
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hand
show examples
,
parents
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take the major
responsibilities
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responsibility
show examples
for
this
Linking Words
behavior
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behaviour
show examples
since many of them
uses
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use
show examples
many
distraction
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distracting
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ways to keep their children busy when they
cried
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cry
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rather than
spends
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spend
show examples
time with them or
full
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fill
show examples
their time with many beneficial activities
such
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as
,
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apply
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playing football,
drawing
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or drawing
show examples
.
In addition
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, playing around with kids at the same age
thus
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develope
Correct your spelling
develops
their social activity and
enhance
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enhances
show examples
their brain growth
as a result
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,
human
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humans
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with emotional and mental stability
allow
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are allowed
show examples
them
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apply
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to face
life
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life's
show examples
difficalties
Correct your spelling
difficulties
and challenges .
Recent
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A recent
show examples
study
founds
Correct your spelling
found
show examples
close to 80% of children between
Correct article usage
the age
show examples
age
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ages
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3
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of 3
show examples
year to 10
year
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years
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have mobile
phone
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phones
show examples
,
Ipad
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iPads
or even
computer
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computers
show examples
.
Furthermore
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,
this
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alarm with a huge crisis in
modern
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the modern
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world.
On the other hand
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,Mobiles and
Ipads
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iPads
show examples
isolate
childs
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children
show examples
from their surrounding
enviroment
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environment
which
lead
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leads
show examples
eventally to
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an increase
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increase
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increased
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the
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apply
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desire to stay alone and
having
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have
show examples
unreasenable
afraied
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fear
of others.
Although
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many that the situation
not
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does not
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require
people
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people's
show examples
concern ,
i
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I
show examples
agree with the opposite view .Direct
society
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society's
show examples
concentration
to
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on
show examples
this
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subject will reflect positively not only on
childrens
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children's
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lifestyle and behaviour but
also
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their
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on their
show examples
parents
Use synonyms
.
In addition
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to the adults surrounding them ,social media and the way digital
targeting
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targets
show examples
young
aged
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
people with devices and distraction tools. In conclusion,
children
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children's
show examples
mental health and psychological state require
series
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a series
show examples
steps
Change preposition
of steps
show examples
to overcome the crisis and prevent any future
difficalties
Correct your spelling
difficulties
.
Parents
Use synonyms
and
socity
Correct your spelling
society
could lead to
huge
Add an article
a huge
show examples
improvement.

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Coherence & Cohesion
Enhance the clarity of your arguments by organizing the essay into distinct paragraphs. Each paragraph should address a specific point related to the topic.
Task Achievement
Provide more specific examples or evidence to support your points. This would make your essay more convincing and comprehensive.
Task Achievement
Ensure the introduction and conclusion clearly outline your position regarding whether childhood is in crisis due to increased depression and antisocial behaviors.
Coherence & Cohesion
Pay attention to grammatical errors and spelling mistakes. While a few errors won't detract significantly from your score, multiple errors can affect coherence.
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the relevant issue and takes a clear stance on the topic.
Coherence & Cohesion
You articulate the role of technology in affecting children's mental health, which is a significant and modern concern.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • prevalence
  • societal pressures
  • academic demands
  • technological influences
  • parental neglect
  • family structures
  • mental health issues
  • economic inequality
  • community support
  • well-being
  • heightened awareness
  • improved diagnosis
  • advancements in mental health treatment
  • social support systems
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