Levels of depression and antisocial behavior in children have increased dramatically in modern societies. This situation has led many people to believe that childhood itself is in crisis. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

#levels #depression #behavior #children #societies #situation #people #childhood #crisis

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Nowadays children have been confronted with a new psychological reality, many

kids

Use synonyms

have been experiencing depression and antisocial behaviours. Some

people

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argue that

this

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situation

leds

Correct your spelling

leads

to a childhood crisis in our society.

This

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essay will highlight the points why I agree with

this

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collocation.

To begin

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with, it is important to acknowledge that we are living in a sensitive world, with the

advacement

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advancement

of technology, and

consequently

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, social

medial

Replace the word

media

show examples

kids

Use synonyms

are exposed to a lot of information. There is no doubt that

this

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bunch of information has psychological

affects

Correct your spelling

effects

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

the

Use synonyms

kids

Change noun form

kid's

kids'

show examples

brain.

However

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

need to be very careful

to do

Verb problem

apply

show examples

not

Fix the infinitive

to diagnosis

show examples

diagnosis

Replace the word

diagnose

show examples

a child just because they are feeling emotions. It is normal to feel upset, it is normal to

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

not feel open to

make

Wrong verb form

making

show examples

friends,

Correct word choice

and it

show examples

is normal to have bad days. And,

instead

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understading

Correct your spelling

understanding

and normalizing feelings,

people

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are labelling it. That said, that are

also

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limits, how it was mentioned before,

kids

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are consuming a

lot

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lot of

show examples

social media. And most of the time,

this

Linking Words

is not good for them.

Instead

Linking Words

of feeling motivated, they start feeling frustrated for not having the life they see on the screens. There is a quote that says "

the

Capitalize word

The

show examples

neighbours

Change to a genitive case

neighbour's

neighbours'

show examples

grass is always greener". The

kids

Use synonyms

does

Change the verb form

show examples

not have

they

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

cortex central developed yet, they do not know how to control their emotions, and most of the time, they do not know even how to name

Correct pronoun usage

them

show examples

This

Linking Words

end

Change the verb form

ends

show examples

up causing a lot of frustration and sadness, and without having

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

good social support, it can end up with a serious mental health condition. In conclusion,

people

Use synonyms

need to be more aware of what is really happening with the kid

instead

Linking Words

of labelling it. Depression and antisocial behaviour

Verb problem

apply

show examples

condition

Fix the agreement mistake

conditions

show examples

, and

Correct pronoun usage

they

show examples

cannot be diagnosed that

easy

Change the word

easily

show examples

In contrast

Linking Words

, there are many challenges for the

kids

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this

Linking Words

generation, the high exposure to social media, and

compariting

Correct your spelling

comparing

themselves to their peers

what

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

can lead to mental health issues.

Submitted by nathmoura on Fri Jan 24 2025

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task achievement

Try to elaborate on your points with more specific examples and detailed explanations to enhance task achievement.

coherence cohesion

Ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea and flows smoothly into the next for better coherence and cohesion.

task achievement

The essay presents a clear opinion and addresses the task prompt about childhood being in crisis.

coherence cohesion

There is a distinct introduction and conclusion in the essay, providing a framework for the discussion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
27
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

332 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

prevalence
societal pressures
academic demands
technological influences
parental neglect
family structures
mental health issues
economic inequality
community support
well-being
heightened awareness
improved diagnosis
advancements in mental health treatment
social support systems

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Levels of depression and antisocial behavior in children have increased dramatically in modern societies. This situation has led many people to believe that childhood itself is in crisis. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

Fully explain your ideas

An increasing number of professionals such as doctor and teacher are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problem does this cause? What can be done to deal with this situation?

some people believe that experiments with animals should be outlawed, while others are convinced that it is the best way to achieve some sientific goals. how do you thing is there is any possible alternitive and should experimentations be outlawed?

You have bought some clothing online and are not satisfied with your purchase. Write a letter to the company that you bought the clothing from. In your email -Give detail of the purchase -Desribe the problem -Explain why you need a replacement urgently.

In some countries, children under 16 years old are not allowed to leave school by law and get full-time work . Is this a good or bad thing ? Discuss your opinion.