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Writing Samples
Band 6

The figure below shows the types of transportation people use and the reasons for car usage in Edmonton.

The figure below shows the types of transportation people use and the reasons for car usage in Edmonton.
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The figure below shows the types of transportation people use and the reasons for car usage in Edmonton.
Overall
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, the most common mode of transportation for residents of Edmonton is the private car,
while
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 the least commonly used are the bus and taxi, both at the same proportion. Most people use cars for commuting to work, conducting business, and taking children to school, respectively.
It is clear that
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 cars are the most widely used, accounting for 45
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percent
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per cent
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 of the total population. The metro was the second most popular alternative, at 35
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percent
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per cent
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. The primary reason people use cars is for commuting to work, at 55
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percent
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,
in contrast
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 to shopping and leisure activities, which were the least cited reasons, each at 15
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percent
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per cent
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. Transport by bus and taxi was the least popular, at 10
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percent
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 each. Taking children to school and conducting business accounted for 40
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percent
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 and 50
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percent
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, respectively, of car usage.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words percent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "figure" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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