Some modern artist receive huge sums of money for the things they create, while other struggle to survive. Governments should take steps to resolve this unfair situation. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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While

Linking Words

many talented

artists

Use synonyms

struggling

Wrong verb form

struggle

show examples

servive

Correct your spelling

survive

service

,others face

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

huge

economical

Correct word choice

economic

show examples

growth .There are growing

needs

Fix the agreement mistake

need

show examples

Change preposition

for

show examples

governments to find solutions to

supporting

Change the form of the verb

support

show examples

them financially which

Change the capitalization

show examples

agree with . At the onset,

Art

Use synonyms

has changed

alot

Correct your spelling

a lot

especially

Add the comma(s)

, especially

show examples

during the past few years .With

increase

Add an article

the increase

an increase

show examples

in the

numbers

Fix the agreement mistake

number

show examples

of fast-

art

Use synonyms

artists

Use synonyms

and

low quality

Add a hyphen

low-quality

show examples

type

Fix the agreement mistake

types

show examples

art

Use synonyms

which support the idea of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

quantity over quality ,many people took the chance to produce

arts

Fix the agreement mistake

art

show examples

additionally

Linking Words

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

good marketing

stratigies

Correct your spelling

strategies

Change preposition

for

show examples

promoting their works.

While

Linking Words

many professional

artists

Use synonyms

struggling

Wrong verb form

struggle

show examples

provied

Correct your spelling

provide

their

Change preposition

for their

show examples

basic needs ,the

goverment

Correct your spelling

government

can significantly contribute to

elevate

Wrong verb form

elevating

show examples

this

Linking Words

reality by providing

programes

Correct your spelling

programmes

programs

Change preposition

for

show examples

sponsorship and

promote

Wrong verb form

promoting

show examples

lesser-known

artists

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

hosting exhibitions ,

workshop

Fix the agreement mistake

workshops

show examples

and materials to emerge

artists

Use synonyms

and allowing them to gain visibility .

In addition

Linking Words

,supporting them financially

allowing

Wrong verb form

allows

show examples

them to create without concern about the money .

One

Correct your spelling

show examples

the other hand,

art

Use synonyms

is subjective many artist get

recognize

Wrong verb form

recognised

show examples

due to

Linking Words

their

audiance

Correct your spelling

audience

However

Linking Words

, the creative way of

promot

Correct your spelling

promoting

promote

arts

play

Correct subject-verb agreement

plays

show examples

a crucial role in nowadays world

whereas

Linking Words

social media and

diffrenet

Correct your spelling

different

platforms contribute

making

Change preposition

to making

show examples

famous

individual

Fix the agreement mistake

individuals

show examples

wheather

Correct your spelling

whether

they are an artist or whatever they are .

However

Linking Words

, some governments have

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

limited

resorces

Correct your spelling

resources

resource

and

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

public funds should prioritize essential

sector

Fix the agreement mistake

sectors

show examples

such

Linking Words

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

education ,healthcare and infrastructure. In conclusion ,

Although

Linking Words

governments have

a huge responsibilities

Correct the article-noun agreement

a huge responsibility

huge responsibilities

show examples

,providing supporting

programes

Correct your spelling

programmes

programs

supporting

Wrong verb form

support

show examples

artist

Fix the agreement mistake

artists

show examples

will not be

waste

Correct article usage

a waste

show examples

of money since

art

Use synonyms

one

Add a missing verb

is one

show examples

of the main ways to preserve the culture and move it to the next generations .

youmnamaher91Sat Jan 25 2025

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task achievement

Try to give a more balanced view by discussing both sides in more detail. Expand on why some artists earn large sums and others struggle, rather than just solutions by the government.

coherence cohesion

Make sure each paragraph has a clear central idea and ensure there is a logical flow between them. Consider using more linking words to help the essay flow better.

language grammar

Some sentences need restructuring for clarity. Pay attention to grammatical details such as subject-verb agreement and consistency in tense usage.

task achievement

You have a strong thesis statement in your introduction which clearly states your main argument.

coherence cohesion

Good use of topic sentences to introduce the main idea of each paragraph and overall good introduction and conclusion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
50
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

255 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Economic disparity
Market demand
Public visibility
Artistic merit
Equitable distribution
Government intervention
Free market
Bureaucratic complications
Social and economic inequalities
Targeted government assistance
Wider reforms
Commercial viability
Niche audiences
Financial rewards
Systemic issues

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

hildren should take part time jobs in their free time or they should totally focus on their studies. What are the advantages and disadvantages to children of doing so?

Some people believe more actions can be taken to prevent crime, while others think that little can be done.

Television is dangerous because it destroys family life and any sense of community; instead of visiting people or talking with our family, we just watch television. To what extent fo you agree or disagree with this opinion?

In many countries today, people buy a range of household goods ( television, microwave, oven and rick cookers) Is it a positive or negative development?"

A person's worth nowadays, seems to be judged according to social statues and material possession. Old- fashion values such as honor, kindness and trust no longer seem important. Do what extent do you agree or disagree ?