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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The maps below show the changes that took place at a science and technology museum between 1996 and 2016. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The maps below show the changes that took place at a science and technology museum between 1996 and 2016. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The map illustrates changes in science and technology in the
Museum
Use synonyms
 from 1996 to 2016
Overall
Linking Words
, the Science and Technology
Museum
Use synonyms
 has become more residential and modern with the introduction of a range of new facilities . it is
also
Linking Words
 clear that the majority of the modifications took place on both sides of the
museum
Use synonyms
 . Focusing on the 1996 plan, the Car park was bottom, with a print
room
Use synonyms
 and reception to the left side. There was a cafe near the reception with were Diesel
engine
Use synonyms
 exhibition and a steam
engine
Use synonyms
 .
In contrast
Linking Words
, the writing desks at the top of the
museum
Use synonyms
 around
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is library on the right side Since
then
Linking Words
 , the
museum
Use synonyms
 has experienced significant changes. Expected newly built VR
room
Use synonyms
 and the solar area surrounding the car park with bicycle park . The cafe and Diesel
engine
Use synonyms
 were replaced by a new restaurant and electric car .
Moreover
Linking Words
, a digital technology
room
Use synonyms
 with 30 cinemas was built , which resulted in the disappearance of the print
room
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, the writing desks have gone and in their place were computers
while
Linking Words
 the steam
engine
Use synonyms
 exhibition remained intact.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words museum, room, engine with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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