IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people argue that parents should have a strong influence on their children's choice of friends and partners. Others believe that young people should make these decisions independently. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Some
people
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 believe that
parents
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 should play a strong role in deciding their children’s friends and
life
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 partners. Others think young
people
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 should make these
decisions
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 independently.
This
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 essay will discuss both
Linking Words
this
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
and
this
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 essay is written about I strongly believe that children should make these choices on their own.
Parents
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 often want the best for their children and use their
life
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 experience to guide them. They can see risks that young
people
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 might not notice and give advice to avoid bad friendships or unhappy relationships.
For example
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,
parents
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 may warn their children about
people
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 with bad habits or bad intentions. Their advice can be helpful in making smarter
decisions
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.
However
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, it is important for young
people
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 to make their own
decisions
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 because they are the ones who will live with the consequences.
For example
Linking Words
, when choosing a
life
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 partner,
parents
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 will not live with that person—the child will. It is better to marry someone you truly love and are comfortable with rather than someone chosen by
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parents
Correct pronoun usage
your parents
show examples
.
Similarly
Linking Words
, young
people
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 should choose friends who match their character and interests. If I do not like the person my
parents
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suggest
Wrong verb form
suggested
show examples
 for marriage or a friend with a bad attitude, I would not want to be around them.
Life
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 is short, and we should live it the way we feel is right. And I agree that
parents
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’ advice is important, but
life
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 is about learning and growing from our own
decisions
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. Making independent choices allows us to take responsibility for our lives and build relationships that bring us happiness. In conclusion,
while
Linking Words
parents
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’ guidance is valuable, young
people
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 should have the freedom to choose their friends and
life
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 partners. These
decisions
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 affect their daily lives, and they should decide what makes them happy.

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introduction conclusion
Be sure to clearly state your thesis in the introduction, such as specifying your standpoint before mentioning both perspectives. This can help guide the reader through your argument more effectively.
relevant specific examples
Ensure that examples provided are not hypothetical or based on personal anecdotes suggested within the text. This could strengthen your task response and illustrate points more universally.
complete response
The essay presents a well-rounded discussion of both views and effectively communicates the writer's stance.
logical structure
The essay flows smoothly with good use of cohesive devices that link ideas and paragraphs logically.
introduction conclusion
The conclusion reiterates the author's point of view and wraps up the discussion effectively, providing a strong ending to the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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