People today are not as fit as they were in the past. What are the causes of this? What can governments do to deal with this issue?

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Health is wealth, we have often heard
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

a lot.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, it is very
difficuilt
Correct your spelling
difficult

If you don’t want difficuilt to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

for
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

to stay fit in today's busy world as compared to the past. So we will discuss the causes of unfit
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

and what important steps
Correct article usage
the

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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government
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

should take to prevent
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

issues
Fix the agreement mistake
issue

It seems that issues may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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in upcoming paragraphs.
Defination
Correct your spelling
Definition

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of being fit has changed a lot. In
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

modern and
biggest
Correct word choice
apply

There may be an adjective issue here.

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growing
era
Add a comma
era,

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase In this modern and biggest growing era. Consider adding a comma.

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people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

thinks
Correct subject-verb agreement
think

It seems that the verb thinks does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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being skinny and six packs are
Add an article
a symbol
the symbol
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Add an article
a symbol
the symbol

The noun phrase symbol seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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symbol
Fix the agreement mistake
symbols
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of being fit where they
dont
Correct your spelling
don't

If you don’t want dont to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

have
enoungh
Correct your spelling
enough

If you don’t want enoungh to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

stamina to keep standing for longer
period
Fix the agreement mistake
periods

It seems that period may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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of time.
People
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

in past were more
avtive
Correct your spelling
active

If you don’t want avtive to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

and used to
evolve
Wrong verb form
evolving

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb evolve. Consider changing it.

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in natural activities
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as fishing, hiking and playing all kinds of sports. I believe that
main
Correct article usage
the main

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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cause of
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

being unhealthy today is consuming more junk foods and not doing
exerceise
Correct your spelling
exercise
exercises

If you don’t want exerceise to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

at all.
People
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

in the past used to have foods which
consist
Wrong verb form
consisted

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb consist. Consider changing it.

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of all the essential
requires
Replace the word
requirements

The word requires doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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by
Change preposition
of

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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the body. Moving
further
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
government
Add an article
the government

The noun phrase government seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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should open public gyms which everyone
could
Wrong verb form
can

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb could. Consider changing it.

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afford and they should invest in training and
should
Verb problem
apply

There may be a verb use issue here.

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host
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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seminars in different places
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as schools, colleges and workplaces to aware
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
Correct word choice
aware.

There may be an adjective issue here.

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Use synonyms
Use synonyms
Government
Correct article usage
The government

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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should mainly focus on providing camps as well where we can educate the
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. in
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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conclusion, I would say that
government
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

play an important role in spreading awareness but it all depends on
individual
Correct article usage
the individual

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
Correct your spelling
choice

If you don’t want choise to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

choise
Correct your spelling
choice whether

The words choise wheathe seem to be misspelled. Consider replacing them.

wheathe
Correct your spelling
whether

If you don’t want wheathe to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

they want to remain healthy and disciplined or should remain unfit for
there
Correct your spelling
their

The word there doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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whole life

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coherence cohesion
Ensure ideas are clearly conveyed by rephrasing complex or awkward sentence structures.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples or evidence to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Maintain consistency in spelling, punctuation, and paragraphing for a polished finish.
task achievement
Expand on the main points with deeper insights or broader perspectives.
coherence cohesion
The introduction clearly presents the topic and the essay's purpose.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and perspective.
task achievement
Overall, the essay addresses both parts of the task question.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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