Some people think that children should be taught to be competitive in school .other , however , say that cooperation and team working skills are more important .discuss both side of this argument and give your own opinion.

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School

playing

Wrong verb form

plays

show examples

a significant role

to build

Change preposition

in building

show examples

student

Fix the agreement mistake

students

show examples

stodent

Correct your spelling

student

students

apply different methods of teaching, in

someeducational

Correct your spelling

some educational

system

Fix the agreement mistake

systems

show examples

some

skills

Use synonyms

excel

Use synonyms

others

Change preposition

over others

show examples

, so

that is

Linking Words

why people believe that

student

Fix the agreement mistake

students

show examples

must

be focus

Change the verb form

be focused

show examples

and

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

competitive.

However

Linking Words

on the other hand

Linking Words

others

Use synonyms

think that work

colaboration

Correct your spelling

collaboration

skills

Use synonyms

are more crucial.

This

Linking Words

essay will examine some key points of two different views and outline my view. On the one hand, some educational systems create their own

curiculum

Correct your spelling

curriculum

which

consider

Correct subject-verb agreement

considers

show examples

that some

skills

Use synonyms

excel

others

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

system

create

Change the verb form

creates

show examples

a different perspective for some people.

For example

Linking Words

, an International school in my country Indonesia,

create

Wrong verb form

created

show examples

a syllabus that mathematics will be more wide compared to sports. In

this

Linking Words

case,

undirectly

Correct your spelling

indirectly

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, society's opinion

are

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show examples

steered

that

Change preposition

toward that

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mathematics is more important than

sport

Fix the agreement mistake

sports

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, resulting

students

Change preposition

in students

show examples

will be

Wrong verb form

being

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more competitive to gain

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

high

score

Fix the agreement mistake

scores

show examples

in mathematics.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, many schools nowadays have applied the team-working

skills

Use synonyms

, which build

Remove the article

apply

show examples

trust between student,

combine

Correct word choice

and combine

show examples

their ability to achieve the goal. I personally think

this

Linking Words

method is more beneficial for students to create their social

skills

Use synonyms

in future rather

Linking Words

then

Replace the word

than

show examples

compete

each

Change preposition

with each

show examples

Use synonyms

others

Change to a singular noun

other

show examples

For instance

Linking Words

, in

working

Add an article

the working

a working

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job, worker are required to work

together with

Linking Words

their team to accomplish a project. So it's common nowadays that schools in

china

Capitalize word

China

show examples

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

aplied

Correct your spelling

applied

this

Linking Words

method.

To sum up

Linking Words

, system education in some schools

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

different methods to teach their students, including

compete

Add the preposition

compete for

show examples

each other and

colaborate

Correct your spelling

collaborate

each other. But I think, working with

team

Add an article

a team

the team

show examples

is more beneficial

due to

Linking Words

it will be required in the future like in working

place

Correct your spelling

workplace

show examples

masry.pakpahanTue Jan 28 2025

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coherence cohesion

Enhance logical flow between paragraphs to make the argument stronger and clearer. Ensure that each paragraph leads naturally to the next.

task achievement

Provide more specific examples and detailed explanations to support your viewpoints. This will bolster your arguments and enhance comprehension.

coherence cohesion

Work on varying your sentence structures more to enhance readability and engagement. Mixing sentence lengths can positively affect the flow of your writing.

task achievement

Try to expand on the conclusion to briefly summarize the discussed points before stating your opinion. This reinforces your argument and provides a rounded ending to the essay.

task achievement

The essay provides a balanced discussion of both sides of the argument, acknowledging differing perspectives.

coherence cohesion

Introduction and conclusion are present and encapsulate the main arguments of the essay.

coherence cohesion

Simple yet clear linkage between ideas and paragraphs, though improvement can boost the overall coherence.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
37
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

262 words

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Some people think that children should be taught to be competitive in school .other , however , say that cooperation and team working skills are more important .discuss both side of this argument and give your own opinion.

In the past, most people used to travel to their place of work. With increased use of computers, the internet and smartphones, more and more people are starting to work from home. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development?

Some people think that the teenage years are the happiest time of most people lives. Other think that adults life brings more happiest, in spite of great responsibility. Discuss both these views and give your opinionp

Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Has this become a positive or negative development?

In spite of the advances ,advancede in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. why is this the case? what can be done about this problem?