Educating children is a more difficult task today than it was in the past because they spend so much time on cell phones, online games, and social networking Website. Do you agree or disagree?

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Nowadays, most of the
children
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are spending lot of
time
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on social platforms and video games. In recent days,
children
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are wasting their
time
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on cell phones, social sites and games. Educating
children
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has become a complex task
due to
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the technological advancement and it's interference on education. I totally agree with the statement and will the reasons in
this
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essay. In past, young
children
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spent lot of
time
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in doing assignments and preparing for exams but nowadays
children
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are spending
time
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in gadgets for entertainment. These difference are caused by the teaching methods. Few years back teachers were strict and preached lot of educational
as well as
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moral values, but today they have so much Lineency. Recent studies show that 5th to 10th grade students are spending atleast 4 to 6 hours in online gaming and social
media
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platforms.
Due to
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this
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, their learning
time
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is reduced and concentration is diverted. Easy accessible to mobiles and laptops are the major reason for educational difficulties.
Moreover
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, every
children
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have the social
media
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accounts like Facebook and Instagram and spending much of their
time
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scrolling.
In addition
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to that, some social
media
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influencers misguiding young minds into enterpreneurship rather than education.
Furthermore
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, students are prone to mental illness
such
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as anxiety and depression when spending more on virtual gaming and social
media
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's. In conclusion, I totally agree that educating
children
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has become a difficult task
due to
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increase in technological advancement. Tackling these issues need both support from parents and
children
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.
Moreover
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, social
media
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and gaming
time
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should be reduced and monitored.

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task response
Ensure to address all parts of the question effectively. It’s important to clearly differentiate between how times have changed for the worse regarding educating children due to technology. You have some good points, but more specific examples can help you achieve a comprehensive response.
task response
Be mindful of grammatical errors and clarity in sentence structure. Avoid repetition, and aim for a diverse vocabulary to express ideas more clearly. This can help improve the comprehensive ideas presented.
coherence cohesion
Enhance coherence by improving transitions between sentences and paragraphs. Using cohesive devices can help in logically ordering your thoughts and ideas.
coherence cohesion
Try to elaborate on your main ideas with supporting examples or explanations. This will not only demonstrate an understanding of the task but also allow the reader to follow your thought process.
introduction conclusion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps guide the reader.
supported main points
The points made are relevant to the question and show an understanding of the topic's complexity in today's context.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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