Some students work while studying. This often results in lacking time for education and constantly feeling under pressure. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

Working

while

Linking Words

studying has become a pervasive and necessary reality among

students

Use synonyms

. Many of them suffer from pressure and do not find enough

time

Use synonyms

to be successful.

This

Linking Words

essay will examine the causes of

this

Linking Words

issue and the available solutions to combat

this

Linking Words

issue. On the one hand, there are many serious reasons why

students

Use synonyms

choose to

work

Use synonyms

while

Linking Words

studying.

First,

Linking Words

a lack of money leads

students

Use synonyms

work

Use synonyms

in part-

time

Use synonyms

jobs.

For example

Linking Words

, the high costs of college force them to

work

Use synonyms

part-

time

Use synonyms

jobs.

Moreover

Linking Words

, some

students

Use synonyms

need extra money for their education and entertainment.

Second,

Linking Words

some people prefer to depend on themselves rather than rely on their parents.

For instance

Linking Words

, independence can shape a person's personality.

Finally

Linking Words

, some

students

Use synonyms

have extra

time

Use synonyms

after classes. In

this

Linking Words

case, they decide to

work

Use synonyms

and learn new skills.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, there are many effective solutions.

First,

Linking Words

students

Use synonyms

should choose a job that offers flexibility. Evening

work

Use synonyms

, consisting of two to three hours, would be ideal.

This

Linking Words

would alleviate the stress associated with being a working student. Studies have shown that working part-

time

Use synonyms

jobs can be effective in moulding future adults.

Second,

Linking Words

governments should provide

students

Use synonyms

with financial aid.

Also

Linking Words

, free or subsidised education would be tremendously helpful.

Finally

Linking Words

students

Use synonyms

should learn

time

Use synonyms

management skills.

This

Linking Words

would be advantageous as

time

Use synonyms

management is the key to balancing learning with working. In conclusion, it is clear to see that financial necessity forces

students

Use synonyms

work

Use synonyms

However

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

problem can be addressed through government financial support for

students

Use synonyms

as well as

Linking Words

other educational financial programs.

alfred

Jan 28, 2025

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coherence

Use more clear links between ideas. Use words like also, but, for example to show flow.

content

Give more strong examples for each cause and for each solution to make points real.

task

Make sure you answer all parts of the task. Start with a clear view in the intro and restate it in the end.

grammar

Check small grammar and spelling errors to raise accuracy.

structure

Begin each paragraph with a clear sentence about its main idea.

structure

A clear plan with intro, body and conclusion.

content

It writes about both causes and ways to help.

content

There are some good examples and details in places.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

263 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Financial necessity
Tuition
Living costs
Employability
Work experience
Under pressure
Mismanagement
Time-management
Academic pursuits
Flexible part-time study
Financial aid
Scholarships
Bursaries
Collaboration
Integrated programs
Education
Work-life balance

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Some students work while studying. This often results in lacking time for education and constantly feeling under pressure. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people think that spending a lot on holding wedding parties, birthday parties and other celebrations is just a waste of money. Others, however, think that these are necessary for individuals and the society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In developing countries, children in rural communities have less access to education. Some people believe that the problem can be solved by providing more schools and teachers, while others think that the problem can be solved by providing computers and Internet access.