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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In some countries, a few people earn extremely high salaries. Some people think that this is good for a country, while others believe that the government should control salaries and limit the amount people can earn. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Earning is extremely essential for everyone to live a better life. In some nations, some groups of
people
Use synonyms
 earn high incomes.
As a result
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, some
people
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 think that it is beneficial for the country,
whereas
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, others believe that it is necessary for the government to control
salaries
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 and limit the number of
people
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 who can earn.
To begin
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 with, there are several merits that can be considered. First and foremost, wealthy
people
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 contribute
high
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a high
the high
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 amount of money to the government through income taxes, which increase the tax revenue of the country.
For instance
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, because of
high
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the high
a high
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 amount of taxes from the high
salaries
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, the government can utilize that money to build infrastructures, increase public services, and organize social programmes, which are helpful to the communities.
Additionally
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, individuals who are earning high
income
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incomes
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 invest their money in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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various types of businesses and start-ups.
Therefore
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,
due to
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 a surge in job
creations
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creation
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, the
overall
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 economic growth of the nation surges.
On the other hand
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, controlling
salaries
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 can create fair competition between
the
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apply
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businesses.
For example
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, nowadays, big companies are providing higher
salary
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salaries
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 to workers.
As a result
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, most
of
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apply
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the
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apply
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well educated
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well-educated
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people
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 prefer to work in
the
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apply
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big organizations rather than
the
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apply
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small companies. Apart from that, because of the control and limit
in
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on
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salaries
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 and numbers of
people
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 who can work, all types of companies have to invest in training and development for their employees for productivity and growth. In conclusion,
according to
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 my opinion, managing incomes and limiting
people
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 to earn are not good options for the nation.
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Also
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Also,
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 it totally depends on individuals choices to earn greater
salaries
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according to
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 their qualifications and experience.

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task achievement
Consider expanding on the discussion of the opposing view to ensure both perspectives are fully balanced and evaluated.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to maintain a consistent use of professional language throughout the essay for clarity and formal tone.
coherence cohesion
The introduction clearly outlines the two perspectives on the issue and sets up the discussion well.
task achievement
The essay provides clear reasons and examples to support both viewpoints in the discussion.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • wealth inequality
  • economic growth
  • motivation
  • talent acquisition
  • consumer spending
  • tax revenue
  • redistributing wealth
  • market forces
  • income disparity
  • social stability
  • freedom of choice
  • meritocracy
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