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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table below shows the production of milk annually in four countries in 1990. 2000 and 2010. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below shows the production of milk annually in four countries in 1990. 2000 and 2010. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The table illustrates the annual amount of
producing
Wrong verb form
produced
show examples
milk
Use synonyms
 in
liters
Change the spelling
litres
show examples
 in
Netherlands
Correct article usage
the Netherlands
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,
Australia
Use synonyms
, Tanzania, and Guatemala in three different years.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is evident that,
excepet
Correct your spelling
except
 for
Australia
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, the amount of manufacturing
milk
Use synonyms
 in all given countries increased in 2010. Notably, both
Nertherlands
Correct your spelling
Netherlands
 and
Australia
Use synonyms
 had the largest
number
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 in producing
milk
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 in all given years. In 1990,
Netherlands
Correct article usage
the Netherlands
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 had the highest
number
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 in
maufacturing
Correct your spelling
manufacturing
milk
Use synonyms
 at around 11,262,000
Use synonyms
litre
Change to a plural noun
litres
show examples
;
however
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 steadily declined to 11,155,000
Use synonyms
litre
Change to a plural noun
litres
show examples
 in 2000, before increasing to 11,466,000
Use synonyms
litre
Change to a plural noun
litres
show examples
 in 2010, the highest
number
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 among other countries.
Australia
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 produced 11,246,00
litre
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 of
milk
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 in 1990, the second highest
number
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.
This
Linking Words
 figure dropped slightly to 11,105,000
litre
Use synonyms
 in 2000
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 and
reaching
Wrong verb form
reached
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 9,165,000
at the end
Linking Words
 of the period. Tanzania began the period at 87,00
litre
Use synonyms
 of
milk
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 and rose significantly to 1,42,000 in 2000,
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
eventually increasing to 1,55,000
litre
Use synonyms
 in 2010. Guatemala had the lowest amount, which was 26,000,
however
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 pattern grew gradually, reaching 84,000 in 2010.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words milk, australia, number, litre with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
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