IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Many people believe that formal "pen and paper" examinations are not the best method of assessing educational achievement. Discuss this view and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Although
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 some believe that the traditional way which is writing
in
Change preposition
on
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 paper with
pen
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a pen
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 is the most beneficial way to get the best results in education achievements ,
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while
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apply
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others think the opposite . From my own
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perspective
prespective
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prespective,
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 I disagree with the first statement and
this
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 is because teaching in
practical
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a practical
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 way is
away
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way
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 more useful and our world now is more advanced . On the one hand , students are more interested in the
practic
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practical
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 fields because they find it more exciting .
In addition
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 , when they do something with passion they will learn more and all of the things that they are doing
they
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apply
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are going to
stuck
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be stuck
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 in their minds.
For example
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, doing Chemical
expermintes
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experiments
 will introduce the learners to new skills so they will gain
the
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apply
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knowledge in
fun
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a fun
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 and easy ways.
On the other hand
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 , with our new
technologies
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technologies,
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 there are a lot of colourful and cheerful apps and websites that have been created to assist
the
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apply
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students who are looking
for
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to
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 learn and
anjoy
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enjoy
 at the same time .
Furthermore
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, those
kind
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kinds
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 of new methods are more appealing for everyone.
For instance
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 , Duolingo is a vibrant app that
teach
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teaches
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 languages , it is very useful and
any one
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anyone
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 can download it . In conclusion , with the current development that we are
witnessing
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witnessing,
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 we can find more methods that
they
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apply
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will help
the
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apply
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educators
to
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apply
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gain the highest quality education .

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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that ideas logically progress from one to the next. Consider using signpost words or phrases to help guide the reader through your argument, such as 'firstly', 'moreover', or 'on the contrary'.
Task Response
Develop your arguments further by explaining ideas in more depth and providing more specific examples or evidence to back up your claims. This will enhance the persuasiveness of your essay.
Language Use
Work on expanding your range of complex grammatical structures and vocabulary to enhance your essay's fluency and sophistication.
Task Response
The essay presents a clear position which disagrees with the traditional examination methods. This clear stance is a strong point and well communicated.
Coherence and Cohesion
It includes a structured introduction and conclusion that bookend the main body effectively. This helps in maintaining clarity throughout the essay.
Task Response
The use of examples, particularly involving technology and practical application, helps to illustrate the points made and engages the reader.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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