IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Many feel that the common educational system of teachers and students in a classroom will be replaced by the year 2050. Do you agree with this view? Give your opinion.

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A few people believe that learning at schools and
collages
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colleges
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 with teachers and
students
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 in a classroom will be replaced by artificial intelligence by the year 2050.
Educational
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The educational
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 system is constantly changing all over the world with recent advancements
such
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 as Smart classrooms, virtual reality practical
classes
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 and online
classes
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. I totally agree that traditional classroom culture with
teacher
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teachers
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 and
student
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students
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 sitting in the same
classes
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 will be replaced in future.
In particular
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, after covid
crisis
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crisis,
show examples
 most of the schools
adapted
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adopted
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 online teaching methods which is convenient for both tutors and
students
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.
Moreover
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, it reduced the expenses of travel,
school
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and school
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accesories
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accessories
 and saved
lot
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a lot
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time
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of time
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 which children use
it
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apply
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for other
extra curricular
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extracurricular
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 learning. Even though
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
online
classes
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has
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have
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 significant benefits, it comes with drawbacks
such
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 as lacking individual attention to
Add an article
the student
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student
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students
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, eye strain and fatigue
due to
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 prolonged screen exposure.
For example
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, poor countries like Africa and Somalia
adapted
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adopted
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 online teaching methods with single
projector
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projectors
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 and internet
connection
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connections
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 that benefited
lot
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a lot
show examples
 of
underpriviledged
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underprivileged
 children's education. Most
of
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apply
show examples
educational institutions are distributing
gadets
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gadgets
 like Smartphones and
ipad
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iPads
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 for virtual reality
classes
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. Those devices
helps
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help
show examples
 a lot in
pratical
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practical
 learning and saving assignment times.
For instance
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, schools and
collages
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colleges
show examples
 in India started using Virtual reality anatomical models to learn the structure of
body
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the body
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. It is not only
cost effective
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cost-effective
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 but
also
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 improves
critical
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the critical
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 thinking of
students
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. On the negative side,
students
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 without proper guidance and moral support
of
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from
show examples
 teachers can go
in
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on
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wrong
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the wrong
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 path. In conclusion, I totally agree that future
classroom
Fix the agreement mistake
classrooms
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 will be different from now, but incorporating traditional teaching methods with technological
advancement
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advancements
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 like AI and smart classrooms can significantly enhance
the
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apply
show examples
learning.

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coherence cohesion
To strengthen coherence and cohesion, consider using transitional phrases to improve the flow between paragraphs and ideas.
task achievement
Work on minimizing grammatical errors to express ideas more clearly.
introduction conclusion present
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the discussion about the future of education.
relevant specific examples
Examples are well-chosen and help illustrate points, particularly the reference to developing countries adapting online teaching methods.
complete response
The response directly addresses the task, providing arguments and counterarguments about the potential changes in the educational system.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • artificial intelligence (AI)
  • machine learning
  • online learning platforms
  • virtual reality (VR)
  • personalized AI tutors
  • tailored educational experiences
  • human interaction
  • mentor
  • inspire
  • psychological needs
  • group discussions
  • teamwork
  • social aspects of learning
  • critical life skills
  • digital-only format
  • hybrid model
  • educational accessibility
  • personalization
  • facilitating learning
  • curiosity
  • innovation
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