Modern high technology is transforming the way we work and is of benefit to all of society. Do you agree or disagree?

The latest advanced equipments have greatly influenced our everyday lives including work habits.
This
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is primarily seen as an opportunity for community transformation. I would
however
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disagree with
such
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a notion for various reasons.
To begin
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with, modernization poses a huge security risk. Enormous amounts of data are usually stored online, including private and sensitive ones.
This
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makes us highly susceptible to identity theft or even hacking.
This
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may
also
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compromise business enterprises whose production heavily relies on databases of information. Overdependence has
also
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been a rising problem throughout the society. In detail, since tasks are mostly done through different devices, overconsumption of AI-generated software like Grammarly and autocorrect features
result
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results
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in employees losing their creativity and integrity. In effect, room for growth and improvement is diminished.
Furthermore
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, the number of gadget-related diseases is
also
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peaking. With the increasing number of work-from-home setups, employees are highly exposed to the radiation emitted by their laptops and other accessories resulting in eye strain and headaches.
In addition
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, back problems are
also
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linked to poor posture
while
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working.
Moreover
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, it is indeed undeniable that over over usage of computers causes health problems despite age. To end
this
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discussion, it is evident that modern technology changed our work ethics and brought major differences to society.
However
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, I highly think that issues concerning safety, independence and well-being should not be overlooked especially in the consumption of
such
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high-end machines. In conclusion, current occupational practices regarding technology result in numerous negative effects if not mitigated in the future.

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coherence cohesion
Improve logical structuring to ensure a smoother flow between paragraphs and ideas.
task achievement
Include more specific examples to support your points effectively.
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Clarify some of the ideas presented to enhance reader understanding.
coherence cohesion
The essay contains a clear introduction and conclusion that frame the discussion well.
task achievement
The topic is addressed from multiple angles, considering various negative aspects of technology at work.
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